Steely
Active Member
I have had 6 weeks of great mental peace (other than not sleeping) since I moved - and now I feel the internal frustration building again. I cannot keep up, it seems, with work, not to mention life - and I feel mad all of the time, and frustrated, and I can sense the depression creeping back in.
I cannot trace my unrest back to any one event. I had to travel to UT for 3 days this week, and I do not know when my next day off is. Matt is not doing so well. I miss H. But those are all somewhat normal things for me.
It seems like the move initially alleviated the depression and anger - but my normal, dysfunctional ways have crept back in? But I do not know how. I tried so hard in the beginning to keep the anger and negativity away from my soul - but slowly I have absorbed it back.
I want to find that permanent place of Zen in my life. I do not want always feel annoyed at the world, or be sad. What is the secret to living in a place of peace?
I cannot trace my unrest back to any one event. I had to travel to UT for 3 days this week, and I do not know when my next day off is. Matt is not doing so well. I miss H. But those are all somewhat normal things for me.
It seems like the move initially alleviated the depression and anger - but my normal, dysfunctional ways have crept back in? But I do not know how. I tried so hard in the beginning to keep the anger and negativity away from my soul - but slowly I have absorbed it back.
I want to find that permanent place of Zen in my life. I do not want always feel annoyed at the world, or be sad. What is the secret to living in a place of peace?