Hi Everyone, I have been reading for quite awhile and have tried to get as much info from all of your experiences. My difficult child is my 16 yr. old daughter. Her problems started at 12 and a half, 2 months after starting 7th grade. Good student in elementary school, ballet lessons, soccer all that stuff. Always had friends, but changed friends a fair amount. Since 7th gr. it has been all down hill. We have had years of verbal abuse, physical altercations between her and I and husband. Child Serv. visited twice. Police called when she wouldn't stop raging, etc. She started shoplifting a year ago, been caught twice. Has stolen $ from us 6 or 7 times in the last year and just this week found the key to my locked trunk and cleaned out her brothers wallets and pawned her grandmother's rings. She has been in a relationship with a 21 yr old who is a complete enabler in all of this. He has started picking her up at school everyday because she cuts classes regularly. As of this time(since the theft) she is staying with him at his brothers and isn't in school at all. My husband told her not to come home until she returned what she has stolen. She is in complete defiance to our rules of the family. She was diagnosed ADD last year and was on concerta and adderall but it didn't really do much to help her. Same bad attitude towards us, teachers. She scraped by grade wise last year. I can't get her into counseling, she refuses. I guess I'd like your ideas on where to go from here. We can't keep living with her like this. I want to pursue the theft charges(will meet with officer on Friday) and possibly force her hand into a youth program. If that actually works the program doesn't start again until spring. Until then I would like to see if Family services could place her in a foster or group home. My husband husband doesn't believe this is possible because she actually has a home. I simply cannot live with her anymore, I am only calm when she is gone. I know we can't legally kick her out until 18(Oregon) but she can't be here either. Sorry to ramble, I guess just looking for support and maybe some different viewpoints on this mess.