Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Genny, Jul 24, 2008.

  1. Genny

    Genny Worlds Best Nana

    I haven't seen you around in ages! Welcome back - though I'm sorry you had to come back. Maybe you're like me and still lurk, but things have improved with difficult child (said the eternal optimist;)).

    Give us an update please. How are you/husband/difficult child/easy child?

  2. tawnya

    tawnya New Member


    You were one of my best friends "back in the day". And, yes I do lurk a lot.

    You made my day just asking! I guess I should get out of lurk mode more often.

    difficult child left and moved out a couple of years ago, and I was scared to death. But, long story short, she is/was doing great. Until she lost her job....sigh. She is "engaged" and to be married next July. It makes me want to scream, but what can I do?

    Our easy child just graduated HS this past May. It was awesome. She's got a full ride to IUPUI for radiology. I'm so proud of her. I hope she can keep up with the schedule.

    I am so happy that your difficult child is doing so good it makes me want to cry, oh heck I've already done that.

    You always made me feel welcome because you were one of the "ones" of the family that was a "step" parent who understood.

    I still thank God that I found this board, even if I don't post much anymore.

  3. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    SO! You still have the Star flower eh? I bet it is the most beautiful one.

    I still have the Tawnya rose - it's enormous - this year it got so many blooms on it - people drove by slow to look at it - it's a crawling rose. The only one in my yard.

    I'm glad to see things are going so well for you. Wish I could say the same for myself - but like you said - Take my own advice - (I'm obviously not using it) lol - LOL not really - lol.

    Glad you are lurking - YOu little lurker you! GREAT to "see" you again.

  4. Genny

    Genny Worlds Best Nana

    Wow - I'm SO happy that your difficult child has made such progress! Beats the heck out of her living in your basement and treating you like cr*p, eh?:tongue:

    And way to go easy child! :bravo:
    You and husband must be so proud.

    I don't know how much or how long you've been lurking, so I'll give you the condensed version of our past few years. Yes, my difficult child has improved by leaps and bounds. We certianly didn't predict it when she got pregnant by her abusive boyfriend :surprise:! But she is a GREAT mom, testified against boyfriend in front of a jury (after he tried to kill her), and recieved her Associates degree this past May. Next month she starts as a junior at a prestigious private college (with an almost free ride), majoring in social work and minoring in criminal justice. She wants to work with at-risk youths who end up in the juvenile justice system (that one still bowls me over). husband has stopped falling over every time she says "you were right, Dad", having heard it so many times now. She has no contact with her bio-mom since she was cut off for not giving bio-mom money and she doesn't care:tongue: (yes, bio-mom would try and guilt money from her 22-year old full-time college-student, full-time single mother daughter who works part time). Oh, I almost forgot the best part - the GRANDBOY! He is the smartest, funniest, oldest soul in a little body I've ever met. He's a joy, and we love having him (he's spending the night tonight, as a matter of fact:D).

    I hope you and husband are enjoying the relatively drama-free life! I think once a difficult child, always a difficult child - even our "angel" is still prone to drama, and it drives me nuts sometimes...but when I think of how far she's come...

    We step-moms have some good advice to offer (and the battle scars to prove it). You should post more often! I know I'm not as active on the board as I used to be, and sometimes I'll go a couple weeks without checking it, but I always end up back here.

    I'm so glad to hear your good news. by the way, is this the same guy difficult child was engaged to before? Do you think the wedding will actually happen?

  5. Genny

    Genny Worlds Best Nana

    I want a Star flower and a Tawnya rose!
  6. tawnya

    tawnya New Member

    Star, sadly the Star Flower went to its great reward. I'm glad to hear the Tawnya Rose is still going strong. I have acres of sweet corn, though. Do you want me to name them after you? LOL

    Genny, do you want me to call my zucchini and squash after you? Would you rather be a Genny Squash or maybe Genny tomatoes? You are a tomato aren't you?

    I remember all of that with your difficult child and the boyfriend who almost killed her. Good for her for moving forward. It has been a hard battle.

    I have been struggling the past few years as a produce farmer. Hard work, little pay, but peace of mind. I have always LOVED gardening. The hardest part is working for six months before you get paid a single nickle. I have a killer tan, though. Of course I have to put up with mother in law, since it is her property that we rent. SIGH... on that one.

    The reason I came out of lurk mode awhile back is difficult child sister in law. She is 52 yrs. old and MR (I don't know how to say that anymore without offending anyone). She has started hitting my 76 yo mother in law, who is crippled at the knee and hip. It is a disaster. mother in law is trying to get her placed in a group home (which I think sister in law would have LIKED about 20 yrs ago.) It's a mess and no one will do anything about it except say the same things over and over again. husband told me to "stay out of it and he will take care of it." OK Long story short, mother in law is going to get hurt and it is really frustrating.

    And yes, it is SO much better without difficult child screaming at me from the basement. She is doing well, but know she has time on her hands since she "lost" her job. This is scary because she always gets into trouble when she has time on her hands. At the end of last year, we found out (about two days before she had to be in court) that she had written a bad check and the PIZZA PLACE! was pressing charges. So, husband went with her and it was mostly just fines (that he continues to pay), so she got off relatively easily. Then, ......a second charge identical to the first. Same thing. husband asked her it this was all, and she said yes because she threw the checkbook away! Baby steps.

    This is not the same boyfriend. She told us that she met him at work, but slipped up later and said that she met him online! That one almost killed me, but he seems like a nice enough guy so far. I don't know if they will go through with the wedding or not, and I am finding that I like not knowing so much.

    Star, our difficult child is now 26 and just getting going on a "normal life". I never thought in my wildest dreams that we would actually get along now, but it is happening, and I am still in awe.

    Keep the faith because some days that is all you have!

  7. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    Welcome back Tawnya!

    Great update!!