My kids do not like to read. This has been a personal frustration to me because I grew up with a book in hand. My mom would threaten with, "And I don't want to see you reading until the chores are done".
Anyway, I do know that Diva has read some on her own. She used to love to read until a very know-it-all 1st year teacher told the 4th graders that they were to read 20 minutes each night. So, Diva started to set the timer and would stop at 20 minutes because her teacher told them to read just 20 minutes each night!!!! I was so mad, there are two kinds of readers - one you tell to read a set amount of time because they do not like to read and one you tell to read until they want to stop because they love to read. Setting that timer was a burden to Diva, it put an unneccessary strain on her enjoyment of reading so she just stopped reading. I could not get her to understand that the teacher was wrong in this - I had already started to be the stupid mom who knows nothing in her eyes. The teacher thought she found the greatest reading program in this "rule" that she would not listen to me. She did not communicate well with parents on anything.
Now, difficult child has never been a reader. He has done well on those short comprehensive tests but that is because they are less than a page long and he can look back to find the answers. He states he does not like to read because he can not remember what he reads. He has read two very very short AR books and failed both tests so is now avoiding reading again.
I asked the teacher for help and her answer was to have her help him find a book and for me to encourage him to read. She believes that his problem is in only avoiding the task.
Today, difficult child brought it up to therapist who encouraged him to keep on reading. I told difficult child to continue taking out the small books until he can pass those tests (he thinks the teacher will get mad if he only chooses short books).
psychiatrist appointment followed the therapist appointment so I brought it up there also. psychiatrist gave difficult child and I each a screening test. He reviewed our answers and concluded that there are enough red flags to warrant further testing. There may be an attention deficit going on that difficult child really is having difficutly remembering long reading assignments.
So, I have forms for each teacher to complete and one for the school counselor. difficult child goes back on Nov 2nd to take a computer test to gauge his attention level (if insurance is approved ect, but I will see about setting up payments if insurance doesn't cover).
psychiatrist states that this could be feeding into his anxiety. If he really can not remember and teachers are not believing it, that would add to the anxiety.
I felt these last two years that there may be a reading problem but with the work we were doing on behaviours, that took a back burner. Now that things have calmed down and he is doing well, we can start looking at things like this in closer detail as they crop up.
difficult child is adamant that he can only remember what is TOLD to him, not what he reads. So, we shall see. The hard part is that many things such as these are so well hidden in avoidance and are so subtle that teachers will not pick up on them or want to refer to whoever tests. They would rather tell us that he needs to work harder, put more of an effort into this.
I agree, he needs to make more of an effort on his end but I am glad we are going to check it out. My gut tells me he would not be avoiding if he felt he could do it. He really does want to do well in school.
Anyway, I do know that Diva has read some on her own. She used to love to read until a very know-it-all 1st year teacher told the 4th graders that they were to read 20 minutes each night. So, Diva started to set the timer and would stop at 20 minutes because her teacher told them to read just 20 minutes each night!!!! I was so mad, there are two kinds of readers - one you tell to read a set amount of time because they do not like to read and one you tell to read until they want to stop because they love to read. Setting that timer was a burden to Diva, it put an unneccessary strain on her enjoyment of reading so she just stopped reading. I could not get her to understand that the teacher was wrong in this - I had already started to be the stupid mom who knows nothing in her eyes. The teacher thought she found the greatest reading program in this "rule" that she would not listen to me. She did not communicate well with parents on anything.
Now, difficult child has never been a reader. He has done well on those short comprehensive tests but that is because they are less than a page long and he can look back to find the answers. He states he does not like to read because he can not remember what he reads. He has read two very very short AR books and failed both tests so is now avoiding reading again.
I asked the teacher for help and her answer was to have her help him find a book and for me to encourage him to read. She believes that his problem is in only avoiding the task.
Today, difficult child brought it up to therapist who encouraged him to keep on reading. I told difficult child to continue taking out the small books until he can pass those tests (he thinks the teacher will get mad if he only chooses short books).
psychiatrist appointment followed the therapist appointment so I brought it up there also. psychiatrist gave difficult child and I each a screening test. He reviewed our answers and concluded that there are enough red flags to warrant further testing. There may be an attention deficit going on that difficult child really is having difficutly remembering long reading assignments.
So, I have forms for each teacher to complete and one for the school counselor. difficult child goes back on Nov 2nd to take a computer test to gauge his attention level (if insurance is approved ect, but I will see about setting up payments if insurance doesn't cover).
psychiatrist states that this could be feeding into his anxiety. If he really can not remember and teachers are not believing it, that would add to the anxiety.
I felt these last two years that there may be a reading problem but with the work we were doing on behaviours, that took a back burner. Now that things have calmed down and he is doing well, we can start looking at things like this in closer detail as they crop up.
difficult child is adamant that he can only remember what is TOLD to him, not what he reads. So, we shall see. The hard part is that many things such as these are so well hidden in avoidance and are so subtle that teachers will not pick up on them or want to refer to whoever tests. They would rather tell us that he needs to work harder, put more of an effort into this.
I agree, he needs to make more of an effort on his end but I am glad we are going to check it out. My gut tells me he would not be avoiding if he felt he could do it. He really does want to do well in school.