Unusual Situation.......Need some quick help plz

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Hound dog, Jul 6, 2013.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Do you all remember a while back when I wanted the job at the candle factory where Nichole worked? It pays well, the hours are good, and it is full time work. (rare) And the person who called said I had to have 6 months experience. I know that requirement is bogus as hades..........this is a small area and I know who has worked there and under what circumstances they were hired.

    Well..........I belong to the area fb freebie site, sort of like freecycle but on fb. An ad they are hiring again is posted.

    Now this is where it gets sticky.

    Bff was like a little sister to me, we were exceptionally close until the drug use forced me to back off. (although I was still always there for her when she really needed me) For those who don't know, bff died of an overdose (perhaps assisted) some 3 yrs ago. The woman who posted the ad is bff's sister in law. She has worked for the temp co who hires for the candle factory for years and is who hired Nichole. She is NOT the person who called me for my phone interview when I last applied because I'd have recognized her voice. Know what I mean??

    I will admit right now that I am utterly desperate. I couldn't get more desperate if I tried. We're pricing the silver and china to sell it so next month's house payment and bills might be paid. Yes, it IS that bad.


    I am attempting to pm bff's sister in law via facebook. (we're not friends, I am not friends with any of her family on facebook done on purpose) I thought I'd remind her who I am, let her know the circumstances, and see if she will hire me herself and give me a try at the very least. She can contact her mother in law and sister in law (if they're talking......drama is why they are not my fb friends) and I know they will not only vouch for me but rave about me. I'm the only decent friend bff ever had. They know for a fact that I am no partier and I don't drink or do drugs and that I'm responsible. They ALL know that I was a stay at home mom for a fact.......not just made up to hide work history I don't want them to know about.

    I'm using pm because even if I walked into the office monday morning there is no guarantee I'd get to talk to the sister in law instead of someone else.

    Good idea? Bad idea?

    I would grovel at the woman's feet if it would get me hired. I am NOT joking.
  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I say Go For It! There is an old saying "Necessity Is The Mother Of Invention". Your possible contact method may be unconventional but the worst thing that can happen is that you hear the word "No"...and you've heard that before. I am rooting for you! DDD
  3. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Go for it! The worst that can happen is a no---and you are no worse for wear or tear from that! Good vibes!
  4. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I'm on the ultimate conservative end of the spectrum and... I'm going to agree: Go for it. You have nothing to lose, and lots to gain.

    In today's job market, "who you know" gets you in the door far more often than skills or work history or anything else.
  5. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I'd do it and if you don't hear by Monday, walk into the office and drop her name and see if she's available. by the way, what's the name of the hiring company? I have a neighbor and good friend who hires for the candle factories down here, and if it's the same chain of companies I'm sure she'd give a little extra push for you if you need it.
  6. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Go for it, you're very well-spoken on here, you'll sound intelligent pm'ing her I'm sure. Be brief....as my son says TLDR (too long, didn't read)- avoid that.
  7. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Well, I hit the send button before I could chicken out. LOL

    So now it will be what it will be. And you're right, at this point I have absolutely nothing to lose.

    Having reached the point of pricing the china / silver for sale, severe depression is tough to fight off right now.

    Just the thought makes me physically ill. Makes me feel like I"m "stealing" from my kids. That Nichole's husband is extremely interested in buying some of it...........actually makes me feel even worse. If I weren't so desperate, I wouldn't be facing selling, and Nichole would inherit the silver/china with her sisters. I'm actually the caretaker of sorts for this stuff. Although the girls already have their china sets. (mother in law had many sets, she was the only female and inherited it all)

    That mother in law specifically gave me instructions to sell without doubt if the need ever arose...........really doesn't make me feel any better about it either now that it has actually come down to the wire, so to speak.

    That I'm doing everything within my power to get a job........doesn't help me feel better either at this point. I keep feeling like somehow I'm doing something wrong since I can't get to the interview part of the process. What I'm doing wrong, I have no clue because none of the kids can spot anything wrong with how I'm filling things out either. easy child is finally starting to admit the lack of work history / age is working against me.

    Honestly?? I'd throw up my hands and "give up" completely........except what does one DO when you "give up"?? It doesn't fix anything.......ugh! omg :tantrumsmiley::groan:
  8. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    For anyone over the age of 45... it's about "who you know". They expect you to have a network of people and to use it. You're doing the right thing... and I REALLY hope it works.
  9. Hopeless

    Hopeless ....Hopeful Now

    Glad you hit send and yes the more people you have in the "network" the better chances you have. I learned that in my late 20s and it has kept me in jobs. Good vibes sent your way!!
  10. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Lisa~ Just be prepared to call, email or see her face-to-face. FB messages to non-friends usually go to the person's "other" folder so it may not be seen.
  11. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    IC if that is the case...........then I am probably scr*wed. I'm not the most social creature, in fact, most would say I'm not social at all..........hermit comes to mind. lol

    Witz the temp company is The Reserves Network. Hiring for the candle company here is just about all they do........I've not really heard of anyone being hired through them to do another type of work.

    My hope is that if they were so desperate as to post on the free site, they are desperate for people to fill the slots. The candle company has a bad reputation, it also has a rapid turn over rate. Why I'm not sure except the temp company seems to work to fill the slots more than focus on whom they're filling the slots with...........but then our workforce here is limited. I know they've hired the low end of the welfare pool for at least a decade.......the ones who only apply because they're required to in order to keep benefits, but who are more interested in partying or whatnot and don't last 3 days. Due to the limited work force.....6 months later they will literally hire them again for a repeat performance.......a never ending cycle. They *might* get 1 or 3 duration workers out of every large cattle call. Notice I said *might*. We also have a huge volume of really really stupid people in the area. I'm not saying that to be mean, but think hillbilly and it's not a stereotype around here, I don't have a clue how many manage to graduate. (diploma is required for the job) Nichole's (and others) biggest complaint was having to work with people who couldn't seem to figure out how to fill a box with candles.

    Boring and tedious is about my speed right now. I'd probably enjoy hard work that doesn't require me to think much.

    If I don't hear from bff's sister in law prior to monday.........well, I'd already planned to go into the office on monday first thing anyway so that is what I'll do.

    I don't like to whine. I don't think I'm much of a whiner. (I hope) But this is one of the hardest most stressful times in my life. Most likely made more so because I don't feel like there is anyone I can turn to and just let it all pour out into a big long pity party like I could do with Fred or mother in law. As a result it is often overwhelming. It isn't really the loss of the material things so much. It is the loss of any security. No, thankfully because I prepare for emergencies, I don't have to worry about food ect. But the house is as important as the food.......the utilities just as important as the house.......... And all the while I have to keep up this strong brave face that somehow it will all work out and everything will be just hunky dory.......when it honestly looks about as bleak as possible.

    I'm doing everything (literally) I can think of to do.......and it does not feel like it is helping. I still feel like I'm on a slippery slope of a cliff and the only way is down.

    To cheer myself up I try to tell myself that probably most people could not have held on as long as I have thus far with as utterly little I've had to work with. I've reached the point though that even that doesn't make me feel any better. :( Because had I just let the house go after Fred died, perhaps I could've used the savings nest egg in a better way. (how I don't know) I keep thinking if that 6k hadn't come up missing at xmas time, we'd have a few more months to hang on.....a little more hope.......but it's gone and I don't know where it went.

    I thought daycare would be an answer, but everyone has the same idea.......the market is flooded with mothers/wives out of work who can't afford daycare bringing kids into their homes at rates there is no way I could compete with so for now that idea is gone as well.

    I'm going to stop there because if I go on it will only make me feel worse, and that is the last thing I need.
  12. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry Lisa, I can empathize with you, life can be such a struggle and if you don't have someone, anyone who you can talk to about it, who can really hear you, it does seem so much worse. It's also so hard to hold that strong front for the kids, the others, sometimes it all just feels completely overwhelming and desperate..........I am so sorry. I wish I had words to make it better, you're in a tough spot. You've done everything humanely possible to keep yourself afloat........my heart goes out to you...........sending prayers that help marches in immediately.............hugs too.......
  13. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Lisa, I'll ask my friend if she has any pull with them, or what to do get beyond the "6 months exp" question. That's not her company, but she would definitely know. I'll get back to you by PM before Monday.
  14. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Glad you hit send.
    Good luck. Remember, the squeaky wheel gets the oil. Sometimes being annoying pays off.

    As for the family hierloms....can you pawn them to sister in law? Pay bim back later so you can stil leave them for your girls?
  15. Dixies_fire

    Dixies_fire Member

    I'm sorry hound dog. As we've spoken about before its hard time all around. I'm sending se
    Juju your way for Monday!
  16. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    You MUST hit up those you know for jobs. What NO ONE tells people now is that it is incredibly RARE to hire from an online application. Potential employees are all told to do the online app, and it is a step that must be done. BUT they hire who they know and who is recommended. They do NOT hire from the applications most of the time. We have a whole generation that is told that the only way to get a job is via and online application but reality is that the online apps serve mostly to keep people from hassling employers and HR depts wtih people coming in asking for jobs. A major regional bank with HQ in downtown Cincy has been able to severely cut the HR staff because they just tell everyone to go do the online app and they don't let them into the HR building to even ask for an app the way they used to. I used to work in the bldg with HR and they had a substantial staff because they had so many people who just walked in and those people had to be talked to at least a little bit. It is not unusual.

    the other problem with online apps is the sheer quantity of applications. Though this was a problem before too. One restaurant mgr I worked with actually tried to teach me to go through applications by tossing them up into the air. The ones that landed on the desk got looked at/interviews and the rest got shoved in a file and forgotten. It was ridiculous and he ended up with the staff that he deserved, which was an awful, drug addicted, unmotivated staff, but hey, it wasn't like he was motivated to actually hire good people.

    Talk to those you know. Have easy child, Nichole, the sister in law's, etc... ALL talk to their employers, friends, old school mates, fb friends, and put the word out that you work HARD, will do anything, and want and need a job. That WANT is important. Tons of people need jobs, but not so many want them.

    I think the idea of pawning them to sister in law is great and maybe something to talk over with him.

    This next bit is going to be tough for you. You NEED to let the kids know how hard the times are and that you may need some help. You owe this to them. If they can help, you should let them. They will WANT to.

    Have you considered offering classes in how to store food for long term, how to be frugal, make your own alternatives to store bought to save money, etc....? You could offer this through a library or arts center or even an evening educational center. You have skills that this generation has no clue even exist or are possible, and you could teach them how to do this for a reasonable fee and help both you and them out. You could even do this from your home as long as there was someone you know and trust who could be there with you the entire time for safety. It might not help this month but it might help keep you from getting to this place in the future.

    I know the candle factory in your area and it is a good employer. Or it was. My cousin worked there for quite some time until he got up into mgmt and started partying with his bosses and it ended up getting really strange. But they WERE good to him and really seemed to care about the employees.

    Another job you would probably ROCK at is what Star is doing. You would be amazing as a 911 operator and it might be a steady route to work. Odd as ti sounds, around here the real growth industry is the prison system. It isn't all about being a CO and you would likely be good at lots of different jobs, with or with-o inmate contact. You might want to look into it.

    When you apply, of course do the online application. It is a must but not something to depend on. Find someone in HR or a boss and go and talk to them in person. Send a printed copy of your application or hand deliver it. Take a homemade treat with you if you can. It can be anything. husband got some free business cards and he draws a little cartoon version of himself on the front before he gives it to someone. Or if he doesn't have them drawn, he draws a picture of the person, or a pet that they talked about or whatever seems relevant. He is MEMORABLE because he does this and it gives him a GIANT leg up.

    If they give you a few minutes of their time to talk to you, send the employer/mgr/HR person a thank you note. It makes a huge impact. Does not need to be handy, just business-like, mentions something you spoke about, and how you would like to work for them and benefit the company with this or that skill, then thank you, signature and done.

    I once sat and did calculus homework while waiting for a manager to finish something and be able to come talk to me. I waited over an hour, got my homework done and the fact that I was willing to wait, did not pester the mgr to get done, and kept busy accomplishing something all impressed the mgr enough to hire me. Again, I was MEMORABLE and not in a bad way.

    How far a drive are you willing to make to work? Are you able to talk to people on the phone and to sell things? There is a call center in Cincy that I used to work for. We had people who drove in from Dayton because it paid well and was not physically difficult. It was a good place to work and it was not callng to sell things. Customers called you and then you worked to convince them to add something to their order. It is vastly easier than making sales calls esp cold calls. I can pm the name of the place and where it was a couple of years ago.
  17. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    I'm glad you sent the message! Sometimes the only way to get a foot in the door is to get a TOE in. That's your FB message.

    My husband has all kinds of IT skills and... Doesn't even get a CHANCE. The one he had... The recruiter's wife went into early labor, and by the time he returned someone else had been hired. Despite the fact that husband would have been perfect.
  18. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Susie the idea about the classes to help other folks out is good......I just dunno if it would work here. Not that people wouldn't be eager to learn but because we're getting so economically depressed that they would likely not have funds to pay for a class. I'm still toying with the idea. I'm not so sure it would be easy to teach.........or rather easy for me to teach. So much of what I know I've known/done for so long it is done without thinking. I'm having this issue trying to teach Katie. Currently, she thinks I possess some sort of magic. (I wish) Other things I do for me is just the way I live, I see nothing special about it........like mowing with the manual mower......unless someone brings it to my attention. And other common sense things.......people just don't want to do even when you show them how much they'd benefit from it......like cutting out fast food and preparing the same things at home much cheaper/healthier/tastier. So still toying with it and talking to people.......

    I can't drive as far as Dayton, gas is too high and my car is 13 yrs old. I can go maybe 30 miles out of town everyday......only because I have sister in law to keep my car going if issues come up. The candle factory is not that far from me, although it is out of town. Maybe a 10 min highway drive.

    Like I said, if it is all about who you know then I'm totally scr*wed. My kids know people. Their mother is a hermit who avoids people because I've had far too much drama in my life and have no desire for any more. Bff was my only real friend in town. Other people I know/knew but not that way. I've never been super social and it has gotten worse as I've grown older.

    sister in law's dad works for the prison, but that may be too far a drive......I'll have to ask him. I'll say up front though, I have zero desire to work there, but at this point desire doesn't matter. I just need work.

    I do talk to my kids, and trust me they know exactly HOW BAD it is. There just isn't anything they can do about it. I don't tell them how it makes me feel and such because it just makes them worry more.....than they already are.

    IF Nichole's husband buys some of the family silver he's doing it as an investment. If Nichole just told me she wants it..........I would just hand it to her. It is already hers, well one set is, the other is PCs. How do you sell something to someone it already belongs to?? That is the problem I have with it.
  19. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    You're allowed three degrees of separation. Your sister in law's best friend can put in a good word for you. Seriously. It doesn't have to be people YOU know, just people who know people who DO know you is plenty strong enough.

    That's why you have us.