An old friend and her husband suffered infertility and have just finished the classes to do foster-adopt. I haven't heard from her in years (they moved to Texas 6-7 years ago). I just got an e-mail from her saying that husband and I were their "inspiration" through it all. The thing is, had I known how hard it was going to be to raise abused children, I don't think we'd have done it. I love my kids and wouldn't give them back but it has changed our lives and our future in so many negative ways. I'm trying to remember back to those pre-adopt days. Would I have listened? Would I have understood or is the lives we live with our difficult children something that requires you to walk a mile in our shoes to truly get it? Do I try and tell her what she may be in for?