Well girls......if it's not in my bra? It's not safe. No stone unturned.
Allow me to demon-STRATE.
The shed with the padlock? Nope - took it off the hinges. How did he get into the shop to get the screwdriver, chisel and hammer? He broke out the glass window in the back where we couldn't see him. How did he get into the craftsman tool box? Oh DF figured the 3 deadbolts on the solid wooden door would prevent theft and never locked it. *slap head.
The glove box of the car? Nope - popped that sucker like it never had a lock. How did he get the keys to the car door? "Oh Mom can I wash your car for you?" and I bought it one time, then he systematically went through the house remembering where every other key was hidden or thought it was hidden and took the spare for a later date.
The tampax box? Nope - I have no privacy. He rooted through pads, tampons, maxis, minis, ob's, FDS, - that's actually how I caught him. I smelled FDS and knew I hadn't sprayed it. Opened the box and YUP...my mad money gone.
Taped behind pictures? - Well that was just dumb Star.
Hidden in the cleaning stuff - Okay I thought this was genius - but then again he NEVER helps clean house but DID manage to snoop and take every single bottle of any kind of cleaner to wash his Nike tennis shoes WITH my best towels, and bleach be hanged if it was a dark towel oh well.
In plain sight? OH are you kidding.
In the Bible. Well he does open it occasionally to look for those loose bills.
In a (oh yea you're going to think I'm lying) locked cedar box, inside another locked box, wrapped in a thin blanket inside a burlap bag, shoved in a cardboard box, shoved in the top of the rafters in the potting shed left dusty for months - and -----well you know the rest of this one.
IN a Priority mail box marked A-hole file - apparently it was too much temptation.
In my underwear drawer, In my bra drawer, In my SOCK drawer - and SOCKS are sacred to me......nope - looks, snoops, takes......steals socks.
Took my change, took my jewelry, took and still takes whatever he wants.
We got a safe. He tried to roll it out of the closet. OMG.
And he WONDERS why we said.......Please get a hotel room when you come to town next time.
Even my craft stuff........ALL of the stuff I had bought at yard sales to do scrap booking, and sticky glitter letters, and my stencils and all my pens, markers, crayons, Sharpie markers, glue sticks, ink gel pens......my paint brushes - VERY expensive. My acrylic paints....OMG. GONE. He asked ........twice. (blanket exemption on it all) I'm STILL finding stuff that he's used and took. Recently I found a pack of iron on letters at a yard sale. I put them back for a T-shirt for a cute project I had in mind. They were brand new. I was cleaning up the other night, went through that craft drawer? Guess what letters are MISSING from that pack - yup - his nick name. (No not doody head) UGH...I thought moron - they are IRON ON LETTERS not more glittery stick on letters. EVEN have a pack of MARINE BOAT stick on letters in case we got a boat again and HE TOOK THOSE -----UGH. Scissors?Until he moved out I couldn't hide a pair. EVEN MY $40.00 Fiskars....that are in a closet in a case, in a basket in the tallest tower in the farthest castle. RUINED used to cut wire. Heck you would think he'd just crawled through the garage window again and stolen more of DF's tools again. DF's conservative estimate of stolen tools is around sickening. We would have LOANED him anything he wanted and did. DF says if he steals one more thing he's calling the law. He's just sneaky all the time and we don't catch him - but no one else is ever in the house.
The attitude? I ask once - It all belongs to me. If he GIVES it to you? He can take it back and use it WHENEVER. If he gives it as a gift and you don't USE it quick enough? He can take it back. My favorite? If you buy it from him (because he needs the money?) He can USE it whenever he wants and if he breaks it or borrows it he can do so and you should not say diddle because you got a good deal...a really good deal. So I have stop accepting gifts, stopped buying things - mostly because there's no place I can hide them.....and everything (despite what I've told you all in the past) will NOT fit into my bra.
The end.