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  1. I

    Pregnant 30 year old

    Your choices are: 1. Allow her to live with you and become so attached to the baby that you would allow anything in order to make sure he is okay. 2. Give her a 2-week notice to move out and stick to it. (Better check with her rights. Once someone is living with you they do have legal...
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    Who do we trust?

    Thoughts aren't crimes. I think you absolutely need to tell the therapist because the therapist can't help him if you are withholding information.
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    Problem son turned 19 yesterday

    There is an article in the Parent Emeritus section on Detachment. I think the prior poster's comments on counting your blessings is a great idea.
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    Would you have a problem if it was your child?

    Since the direct instruction part would be about 15 min. I'd say they could wait 15 min.... (Unless it is an emergency and emergencies don't happen every day) I think they should be allowed to go during the practice or seatwork part of the lesson. However, I think if it's a regular thing...
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    Heroin Addict

    I'm glad you found this site. I agree that this would feel surreal. Have you considered going to Nar Anon or Al Anon? To answer your question as to who speaks to their mom that way. I would answer a drug addict who is in a psychotic state and under the influence of drugs. This was...
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    Who Says Pot is not Addictive?

    I live in Ca and hate that it has become legal. There are too many dysfunctional parents who think nothing of smoking it around their kids now. They don't give a thought to their child getting the second-hand high/smoke. I know for my son, pot exacerbates his symptoms. My daughter tried it...
  7. I

    Just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving to all of you

    Happy Thanksgiving. So glad I found this site. Really Really glad.
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    Suggestions Please

    I hope so much the best for your family. Do you have any Al Anon books, like One Day at a Time. I love this book because there is a daily page to read and an index that you can find pages dealing with topics you are going through. I'd recommend Al Anon if you haven't started yet. You have...
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    Food Yes, No Money

    Son called and wanted to come home and shower. Translation: let me come home and lay around and then get money from you for drugs and alcohol. I offered to bring him food because I know he hasn't eaten. But he declined the food and wanted ten dollars. Guess that's enough to get take the...
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    Some days are worse than others...

    I agree. It is harder on us. They're walking throught the journey not fully aware of what is goign on because they're under the influence. We have the front row seats to the drama.
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    I need help for my son!

    Sorry you feel like that. I think people are just sharing their experiences based on your first post. That's great that there were no child viewing involved. My link about paraphillia was more based on the pooping in different places. There is an entire list of fetishes (which I randomly...
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    Some days are worse than others...

    I'm sorry you're dealing with this sadness. I too deal with the torture that comes with my son's illness and addiction. I belong to a couple of groups that help a little bit. Have you been involved in any codependent groups? I just reread today about Internal Boundaries, which make up out...
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    Help with my 13 year old step daughter.

    No, that is not evil of you. You have a 6 year old child to think about. The poor girl has problems that are going to be ongoing. I think you can offer support by insisting that she continues in her mental health therapy. I think you should allow her to visit you all in the day time, but no...
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    I need help for my son!

    I want to say the most important part first: You did not cause this. You can't cure it. You can't control it. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. :( Please don't analyze how you have raised your children. Mental illness has a way of taking over and destroying the good things...
  15. I

    Visit in Jail

    He's so young. Hang tough with not enabling him. I agree that doing what you have to do is the worst feeling. Here's hoping he can see the light without having to go too far down.
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    Son is in Jail

    I am right there with you on the ups and the downs and the extreme feelings of anger. I agree that you should not see him now. I don't see any benefit in that. Jail could be the very best place for him. He can get help in there and maybe grow from the experience. I hope you don't take his...
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    Advice Wanted

    The 4th husband sounds really creepy. Are you sure he isn't a child molester? Maybe he has been molesting this kid all along and that is what has caused the boy to be disturbed. As far as the mother's rage goes. She is using that to control you. She's abusive and one of the tools she uses...
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    Advice Wanted

    ...her will because she is mad at you seems very unbalanced and hateful. Screaming at you because you established a boundary in your home is abusive. *A 15 year old boy trying to get a look at the privates of a 3 year old sounds like a sex offender to me. *Twisting a dogs skin or throwing a...
  19. I

    Two steps forward, one step back

    Thank you Littleboylost, I am hard on myself. It means a lot to me for you to say I am doing amazingly well. That gives me hope.
  20. I

    Son out of control. Wants to move in with deadbeat dad.

    I want to validate your feelings that come from being in an out of control crises. I agree that his father's would be a detrimental place for him to go. I think you need to contact the state-funded facility and report your son's violent behavior. I'm guessing he must have a probation...
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