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Substance Abuse
14 yr old son about to be expelled..
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 488802"><p>Oh I have so been there and so sympathize with you. I wish I had really good advice and an answer for you but I don't really. My son was in a similar position in 9th grade as well... and we tried everything, some of which helped for a while. However I am not sure it helped in the long run as my son definitely still has a drug problem and he is now 20.... and is getting help (we hope) from his own volition... however time will tell if it takes this time. </p><p></p><p>So although there have been other behavioral issues in the past my guess is the drug use is making things much much worse. That was true in our case. Good chance he is using drugs to either self medicate some other issue OR he is dealing with some kind of pain or self esteem issue and is using the drugs to numb the pain. I think both of those were issues with my son but it hasn't been until recently that my son has really sought help for his underlying issues.... however that is where I suggest you really push to figure out what is underlying the drug use. Sounds like you are trying to do that with counseling. I hope your son has a good therapist that can get somewhere.</p><p></p><p>Another suggestion is to see if you police department has a youth officer and if they do check in with them. They can sometimes be helpful (and sometimes not). They may know what kind of services your state has for troubled youth so a call for information could be good.</p><p></p><p>Other than that I don't have any answers except let the natural consequences take their course... don't protect him too much from himself. Get support for you via therapy and a parents group of Alanon might be a good source of help.</p><p></p><p>Good luck.... you have come to a place where we may not have answers but we certainly understand and you are definitely not alone.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 488802"] Oh I have so been there and so sympathize with you. I wish I had really good advice and an answer for you but I don't really. My son was in a similar position in 9th grade as well... and we tried everything, some of which helped for a while. However I am not sure it helped in the long run as my son definitely still has a drug problem and he is now 20.... and is getting help (we hope) from his own volition... however time will tell if it takes this time. So although there have been other behavioral issues in the past my guess is the drug use is making things much much worse. That was true in our case. Good chance he is using drugs to either self medicate some other issue OR he is dealing with some kind of pain or self esteem issue and is using the drugs to numb the pain. I think both of those were issues with my son but it hasn't been until recently that my son has really sought help for his underlying issues.... however that is where I suggest you really push to figure out what is underlying the drug use. Sounds like you are trying to do that with counseling. I hope your son has a good therapist that can get somewhere. Another suggestion is to see if you police department has a youth officer and if they do check in with them. They can sometimes be helpful (and sometimes not). They may know what kind of services your state has for troubled youth so a call for information could be good. Other than that I don't have any answers except let the natural consequences take their course... don't protect him too much from himself. Get support for you via therapy and a parents group of Alanon might be a good source of help. Good luck.... you have come to a place where we may not have answers but we certainly understand and you are definitely not alone. TL [/QUOTE]
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14 yr old son about to be expelled..
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