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Substance Abuse
17 yr old son, defiant and using
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<blockquote data-quote="rc606" data-source="post: 637718" data-attributes="member: 18472"><p>I will never give up trying to help my son, and want him to talk to someone, even if it's not me. I'm even going this week to see a child psychologist to see what my actions should be in this situation. Short of physically manhandling him into a therapists office, not sure how to get him there.</p><p></p><p>Thank you MWM for this insight, and advice...it's much appreciated. I love this forum already, lol.</p><p></p><p>Tonight, my son's girlfriend's Mother called me and told me that she found weed in her daughter's backpack. Which is no surprise because she called me a week ago and said that she thought that my son and her daughter were smoking together. So, we came together and confronted them at the same time, both kids went insane and started cussing us both out. The call this evening was tense because she told me that she had texts from my son asking her daughter to go in on buying weed from the kid that lives right down the street from ME. The Mother went on to explain to me that my difficult child told her that I'd been smacking him around for years, which she admitted was hard to believe...because I'm not that way.</p><p>I honestly think that hurts more than anything, because while there have been times that I'd love to beat his tail, I never have. She also added that their other little girl (13 yrs old) said that my difficult child tried to get her to smoke pot with the older sister and him. She ended the call with, "I like your son, but he's not welcome at our home, and our daughter can't be at your home with him". I fully don't blame her, either. I'm so ashamed of my son right now.</p><p></p><p>When I discussed the details of this call with my son, he said "I swear to God, if you two break us up...." but didn't finish the sentence. My reply was, "what, you'll do what?"</p><p>Then he clammed up and the eyes glazed over. I let him digest it for awhile and then went back in and explained to him that if he really cares for this little girl, he should clean his act up and prove that he can be better. And to show them (her parents) that he's not some dirtbag kid, but rather a young man that wants to do the right thing for himself and their daughter. Then told him that I thought he was still a good kid who is making some bad decisions, but he can turn it all around....and of course that I loved him.</p><p></p><p>I do have a question, should I speak to the parents of the kid that's selling weed to my kid? I almost feel obligated to do so, but feel it might fall on deaf ears as they aren't model parents. But who is, right? What I don't want to happen is to bring any danger to my family if this kid get's busted, because he's a minor also and is buying it from someone who might be angry that their "business" was affected because of my actions. Thoughts?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rc606, post: 637718, member: 18472"] I will never give up trying to help my son, and want him to talk to someone, even if it's not me. I'm even going this week to see a child psychologist to see what my actions should be in this situation. Short of physically manhandling him into a therapists office, not sure how to get him there. Thank you MWM for this insight, and advice...it's much appreciated. I love this forum already, lol. Tonight, my son's girlfriend's Mother called me and told me that she found weed in her daughter's backpack. Which is no surprise because she called me a week ago and said that she thought that my son and her daughter were smoking together. So, we came together and confronted them at the same time, both kids went insane and started cussing us both out. The call this evening was tense because she told me that she had texts from my son asking her daughter to go in on buying weed from the kid that lives right down the street from ME. The Mother went on to explain to me that my difficult child told her that I'd been smacking him around for years, which she admitted was hard to believe...because I'm not that way. I honestly think that hurts more than anything, because while there have been times that I'd love to beat his tail, I never have. She also added that their other little girl (13 yrs old) said that my difficult child tried to get her to smoke pot with the older sister and him. She ended the call with, "I like your son, but he's not welcome at our home, and our daughter can't be at your home with him". I fully don't blame her, either. I'm so ashamed of my son right now. When I discussed the details of this call with my son, he said "I swear to God, if you two break us up...." but didn't finish the sentence. My reply was, "what, you'll do what?" Then he clammed up and the eyes glazed over. I let him digest it for awhile and then went back in and explained to him that if he really cares for this little girl, he should clean his act up and prove that he can be better. And to show them (her parents) that he's not some dirtbag kid, but rather a young man that wants to do the right thing for himself and their daughter. Then told him that I thought he was still a good kid who is making some bad decisions, but he can turn it all around....and of course that I loved him. I do have a question, should I speak to the parents of the kid that's selling weed to my kid? I almost feel obligated to do so, but feel it might fall on deaf ears as they aren't model parents. But who is, right? What I don't want to happen is to bring any danger to my family if this kid get's busted, because he's a minor also and is buying it from someone who might be angry that their "business" was affected because of my actions. Thoughts? [/QUOTE]
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17 yr old son, defiant and using
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