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18 yr old son with depression refuses help
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 643962" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Ok, be patient here.</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry your son was beaten up. That is NEVER right in my opinion. But (and I ask gently) what things were your son engaged in to get the attention of the cops and why on earth did they beat him? I'm guessing this has really been going on for a while now. Is he a drug user or don't you know. Silly, but many of us did not know our kids were using drugs or we thought it was just sometimes a joint. Boy, did I learn fast that teens are good at hiding their real lives.And I don't know about teen boys, but teen girls can cry at will, I swear they can and, of course, that melts a mother's heart. And, of course, they know THAT too and use it for manipulation purposes sometimes...</p><p></p><p>If it may be drugs, remember THAT can cause depression, mood swings, and even violence and many of us have walked down that road. We have about seen it all between all of us.</p><p></p><p>You did not cause this, no matter what. You can't cause somebody else to misbehave. It is a choice they make. You can not cause somebody to have clinical depression either and he is the one who has to step up and accept the help. You can't force medications or therapy into him.</p><p></p><p>My first bit of advice is to drop the guilt of yourself. I don't care how many times your son tells you it's your fault (or you mom, dad, kissing cousin, favorite aunt, neighbor, teachers, etc.) They are clueless, having never encountered young adults like ours. You son's angry accusations do not make it true. You are a good person, here because you love your son so much. And we'd like to give you some suggestions. Do you have any questions?</p><p></p><p>P.S.--We detach with love. We try to not get emotionally involved with our grown kid's dramas. But we still love them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 643962, member: 1550"] Ok, be patient here. I'm sorry your son was beaten up. That is NEVER right in my opinion. But (and I ask gently) what things were your son engaged in to get the attention of the cops and why on earth did they beat him? I'm guessing this has really been going on for a while now. Is he a drug user or don't you know. Silly, but many of us did not know our kids were using drugs or we thought it was just sometimes a joint. Boy, did I learn fast that teens are good at hiding their real lives.And I don't know about teen boys, but teen girls can cry at will, I swear they can and, of course, that melts a mother's heart. And, of course, they know THAT too and use it for manipulation purposes sometimes... If it may be drugs, remember THAT can cause depression, mood swings, and even violence and many of us have walked down that road. We have about seen it all between all of us. You did not cause this, no matter what. You can't cause somebody else to misbehave. It is a choice they make. You can not cause somebody to have clinical depression either and he is the one who has to step up and accept the help. You can't force medications or therapy into him. My first bit of advice is to drop the guilt of yourself. I don't care how many times your son tells you it's your fault (or you mom, dad, kissing cousin, favorite aunt, neighbor, teachers, etc.) They are clueless, having never encountered young adults like ours. You son's angry accusations do not make it true. You are a good person, here because you love your son so much. And we'd like to give you some suggestions. Do you have any questions? P.S.--We detach with love. We try to not get emotionally involved with our grown kid's dramas. But we still love them. [/QUOTE]
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18 yr old son with depression refuses help
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