Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
2 issues - Long
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="SunnyFlorida" data-source="post: 96237" data-attributes="member: 696"><p>Merris, you most certainly are welcome to STAY on this board. Teens/SA is NOT just for teens but also Substance Abuse. My difficult child's are 24 and 20. This is my home as well as PE. Please feel free to visit whichever board is comfortable to you. (PE board is just as nice as Teens/SA too :whew:</p><p></p><p>I was where you're at a few years ago. It's hard to accept that all your "helping" isn't helping. It's hard to swallow that all the parenting that was done feels like it is a slap in the face. It's hard not to think about the shoulda, coulda, woulda's.</p><p></p><p>Substance usage changes the thinking in a person's mind/body. They are not the same person on substances as they are off substances. in my humble opinion, it doesn't really matter what drove the person to use substances.</p><p></p><p>When I mention substances, I don't mean prescribed medication for any sort of condition, I mean either recreational drugs, alcohol, club drugs, and street drugs. There are many instances however where some people become addicted to pain medications due to their chronic pain. I'm not referring to those drugs either.</p><p></p><p>Your situation is a little different Merris in that there was a violent incident involved. Due to that, you probably have some PTSD as well as a healthy sense of awareness.</p><p></p><p>This great folks on this board can give you ideas on how to reduce stress, share/compare their experiences, and can be supportive and caring. What it can't do is make decisions for you.</p><p></p><p>This horrible situation that we parent's find ourselves in with our SA kids is just that horrible. Each of us at some time or another finds the line in the sand that they draw and won't allow their difficult child to cross. Until that happens, we seem to just trudge along. Some of us can "take" so much more than others. Some of us have little tolerance and can take a stand rather quickly.</p><p></p><p>I've been on the board for close to 5yrs now. I know I have progressed in some areas and stand still in other areas. My difficult child's as well have progressed in some and stay stagnant in others.</p><p></p><p>What I do know is that it's ok to try something and fail. It's ok to try something else and have that work for a while. It's also ok to wipe your hands of everything and allow natural consequences to take over.</p><p></p><p>We can't be there forever. We can't get inside our difficult child's head and MAKE them change. If we consume ourselves and allow ourselves to always get sucked into their drama it's not only difficult child thats affected, but ourselves and any other loved ones that we are venting to or have exposure to difficult child. We can take care of ourselves, we can be supportive, understanding, and helpful if asked. We <strong>can</strong> love them from a distance. We <strong>can</strong> create boundries. We <strong>can</strong> take care of us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SunnyFlorida, post: 96237, member: 696"] Merris, you most certainly are welcome to STAY on this board. Teens/SA is NOT just for teens but also Substance Abuse. My difficult child's are 24 and 20. This is my home as well as PE. Please feel free to visit whichever board is comfortable to you. (PE board is just as nice as Teens/SA too [img]:whew:[/img] I was where you're at a few years ago. It's hard to accept that all your "helping" isn't helping. It's hard to swallow that all the parenting that was done feels like it is a slap in the face. It's hard not to think about the shoulda, coulda, woulda's. Substance usage changes the thinking in a person's mind/body. They are not the same person on substances as they are off substances. in my humble opinion, it doesn't really matter what drove the person to use substances. When I mention substances, I don't mean prescribed medication for any sort of condition, I mean either recreational drugs, alcohol, club drugs, and street drugs. There are many instances however where some people become addicted to pain medications due to their chronic pain. I'm not referring to those drugs either. Your situation is a little different Merris in that there was a violent incident involved. Due to that, you probably have some PTSD as well as a healthy sense of awareness. This great folks on this board can give you ideas on how to reduce stress, share/compare their experiences, and can be supportive and caring. What it can't do is make decisions for you. This horrible situation that we parent's find ourselves in with our SA kids is just that horrible. Each of us at some time or another finds the line in the sand that they draw and won't allow their difficult child to cross. Until that happens, we seem to just trudge along. Some of us can "take" so much more than others. Some of us have little tolerance and can take a stand rather quickly. I've been on the board for close to 5yrs now. I know I have progressed in some areas and stand still in other areas. My difficult child's as well have progressed in some and stay stagnant in others. What I do know is that it's ok to try something and fail. It's ok to try something else and have that work for a while. It's also ok to wipe your hands of everything and allow natural consequences to take over. We can't be there forever. We can't get inside our difficult child's head and MAKE them change. If we consume ourselves and allow ourselves to always get sucked into their drama it's not only difficult child thats affected, but ourselves and any other loved ones that we are venting to or have exposure to difficult child. We can take care of ourselves, we can be supportive, understanding, and helpful if asked. We [b]can[/b] love them from a distance. We [b]can[/b] create boundries. We [b]can[/b] take care of us. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
2 issues - Long
Top