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34 year old son is killing my soul
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<blockquote data-quote="Elsi" data-source="post: 742270" data-attributes="member: 23349"><p>Beebz, I completely understand. I am also very attached to all my animals. They mean as much to me as people. (More than most people.) I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved boxers. I know what that pain is like. </p><p></p><p>My family wasn't actively abusive, but I was a weird kid (high functioning Aspergers, undiagnosed until well into adulthood). I didn't have a friend until my junior year of high school and was bullied and made fun of a lot. Animals were (and are) my refuge. They make a lot more sense to me than people do. They accept us for who we are, and ask nothing except that we be kind to them and take care of their most basic physical needs. They don't judge us. They don't care if we're cool or rich or powerful. They are pure love and acceptance. And they are always exactly who they are, and always right in the present moment. I think that's why they are so healing to be around. </p><p></p><p>My partner and I currently have a motley crew of four formerly stray/feral cats and two rescue huskies. (You end up with a lot of homeless huskies, because people don't know what they are getting themselves into and often give up on them somewhere between 6 months and two years old. They need a lot of mental stimulation and physical exercise and are REALLY hard to train - they won't obey a command until they think it over and decide if they agree with you. They are also escape artists.) One of our huskies is almost 16 and has been in a doggie wheelchair for 7 years. One of our cats has 3 legs and one eye. We just lost a 20 year old kittie to kidney and thyroid disease. One of our other kitties is extremely shy due to abuse in a previous life and takes a lot of special handling. We arrange a lot of our lives around our special needs animals. My partner is a park ranger/wildlife manager, so we sometimes do wildlife rescue also. I'm so jealous of your screech owls! We'll have to build a box. We've had baby raccoons, a groundhog, a crow, ducklings (they still come back and live on our property in the summer), baby possums (cuter than you might realize). </p><p></p><p>I also share your grief and worry about our homeless sons. I have learned mine is resourceful in finding temporary places to crash and something to eat. And he always seems to be able to find drugs or alcohol. But I worry all the time, especially now as the weather turns. I feel guilty being cozy in my warm comfortable house with my partner and my animals knowing his life is so unstable. I think of him on cold wet nights and wonder where he's found for himself to stay that night. My communication with him has been sporadic lately. It saddens me that this is the way he is choosing to live.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Elsi, post: 742270, member: 23349"] Beebz, I completely understand. I am also very attached to all my animals. They mean as much to me as people. (More than most people.) I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved boxers. I know what that pain is like. My family wasn't actively abusive, but I was a weird kid (high functioning Aspergers, undiagnosed until well into adulthood). I didn't have a friend until my junior year of high school and was bullied and made fun of a lot. Animals were (and are) my refuge. They make a lot more sense to me than people do. They accept us for who we are, and ask nothing except that we be kind to them and take care of their most basic physical needs. They don't judge us. They don't care if we're cool or rich or powerful. They are pure love and acceptance. And they are always exactly who they are, and always right in the present moment. I think that's why they are so healing to be around. My partner and I currently have a motley crew of four formerly stray/feral cats and two rescue huskies. (You end up with a lot of homeless huskies, because people don't know what they are getting themselves into and often give up on them somewhere between 6 months and two years old. They need a lot of mental stimulation and physical exercise and are REALLY hard to train - they won't obey a command until they think it over and decide if they agree with you. They are also escape artists.) One of our huskies is almost 16 and has been in a doggie wheelchair for 7 years. One of our cats has 3 legs and one eye. We just lost a 20 year old kittie to kidney and thyroid disease. One of our other kitties is extremely shy due to abuse in a previous life and takes a lot of special handling. We arrange a lot of our lives around our special needs animals. My partner is a park ranger/wildlife manager, so we sometimes do wildlife rescue also. I'm so jealous of your screech owls! We'll have to build a box. We've had baby raccoons, a groundhog, a crow, ducklings (they still come back and live on our property in the summer), baby possums (cuter than you might realize). I also share your grief and worry about our homeless sons. I have learned mine is resourceful in finding temporary places to crash and something to eat. And he always seems to be able to find drugs or alcohol. But I worry all the time, especially now as the weather turns. I feel guilty being cozy in my warm comfortable house with my partner and my animals knowing his life is so unstable. I think of him on cold wet nights and wonder where he's found for himself to stay that night. My communication with him has been sporadic lately. It saddens me that this is the way he is choosing to live. [/QUOTE]
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