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A cry for help
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<blockquote data-quote="Atourwitsend" data-source="post: 528653" data-attributes="member: 14543"><p>Thank you everyone for the advice. Mostly everyone is asking for more information so... I am a stay at home mom 30 yrs old. I've been married to my middle school sweetheart for 8 years and together for over 17. My oldest is 5 and my youngest is one. Both of my pregnancies were very high risk with gestational diabetes, pre-eclamsia, toxemia, and placental abruptsion. My oldest was born after 72 hours of labor by emergency c-section and was admitted into the ICU with pneumonia from the stress of the birth. He was 8.6lbs and full term. My second was born by c-section at 8.4lbs. During the c-section for my second the doctors discovered that during my first pregnancy there had been complications that had not been recorded. I ended up having to have massive reconstructive surgery because all of my internal organs had fused together with scar tissue and they had to do a hysterectomy. difficult child is our 5 year old son who is not on any medications. He is HIGHLY intelligent (tested into 1st grade at 3) and is extremely hyperactive. He can turn on and off his hyperactivity when he wants to but mostly he is bouncing off the walls all the time. He is very into guns (he builds them out of legos and other materials) and weapons. His play is centered around 'fighting'. He flies off the handle at the word 'no' and is abusive to anyone who doesn't do exactly what he wants when he wants it. As far as cps goes we have been cooperating fully to try to get him help. They have us doing family counciling right now to work on the way we interact with him. I'm frustrated because the foster mother is not cooperating with us and neither is our case worker. I put in calls to both everyday to try to talk with my son or check on him and they do not answer the phone nor do they call me back. Last night we had a meeting with our psychologist who will be treating my son and he focused more on my husband and I than my son. His foster mother keeps insisting that everything is 'fine' at her home but then in the next breath says that my son said he would stab her for no reason. Then she says he is kicking, punching, and biting(biting is new for him). It is really frustrating because obviously everything is NOT 'fine'. Also she says that she can get him to redirect and comply. Well, the setting in her home is that there are no younger children and he has 100% attention at all times. I explained that that was not a realistic expectation of our family! How can I possibly do that and not ignore my one year old? The worst part is that my family is moving again (my husband is being relocated) but we are moving closer to my family and to more support. I have even contacted behavioral services in our new town and they have jumped on both enrolling my child in the behavioral school and finding councilors and setting up a support system for him when we arrive. When I explained this to the Doctor and said I wanted my son re-evaluated and given an IEP he said that 'that is something we will have to look at in the future'. Why should this wait? Shouldn't we evaluate what is wrong and try to fix that while we are working as a family?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Atourwitsend, post: 528653, member: 14543"] Thank you everyone for the advice. Mostly everyone is asking for more information so... I am a stay at home mom 30 yrs old. I've been married to my middle school sweetheart for 8 years and together for over 17. My oldest is 5 and my youngest is one. Both of my pregnancies were very high risk with gestational diabetes, pre-eclamsia, toxemia, and placental abruptsion. My oldest was born after 72 hours of labor by emergency c-section and was admitted into the ICU with pneumonia from the stress of the birth. He was 8.6lbs and full term. My second was born by c-section at 8.4lbs. During the c-section for my second the doctors discovered that during my first pregnancy there had been complications that had not been recorded. I ended up having to have massive reconstructive surgery because all of my internal organs had fused together with scar tissue and they had to do a hysterectomy. difficult child is our 5 year old son who is not on any medications. He is HIGHLY intelligent (tested into 1st grade at 3) and is extremely hyperactive. He can turn on and off his hyperactivity when he wants to but mostly he is bouncing off the walls all the time. He is very into guns (he builds them out of legos and other materials) and weapons. His play is centered around 'fighting'. He flies off the handle at the word 'no' and is abusive to anyone who doesn't do exactly what he wants when he wants it. As far as cps goes we have been cooperating fully to try to get him help. They have us doing family counciling right now to work on the way we interact with him. I'm frustrated because the foster mother is not cooperating with us and neither is our case worker. I put in calls to both everyday to try to talk with my son or check on him and they do not answer the phone nor do they call me back. Last night we had a meeting with our psychologist who will be treating my son and he focused more on my husband and I than my son. His foster mother keeps insisting that everything is 'fine' at her home but then in the next breath says that my son said he would stab her for no reason. Then she says he is kicking, punching, and biting(biting is new for him). It is really frustrating because obviously everything is NOT 'fine'. Also she says that she can get him to redirect and comply. Well, the setting in her home is that there are no younger children and he has 100% attention at all times. I explained that that was not a realistic expectation of our family! How can I possibly do that and not ignore my one year old? The worst part is that my family is moving again (my husband is being relocated) but we are moving closer to my family and to more support. I have even contacted behavioral services in our new town and they have jumped on both enrolling my child in the behavioral school and finding councilors and setting up a support system for him when we arrive. When I explained this to the Doctor and said I wanted my son re-evaluated and given an IEP he said that 'that is something we will have to look at in the future'. Why should this wait? Shouldn't we evaluate what is wrong and try to fix that while we are working as a family? [/QUOTE]
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