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Substance Abuse
A letter I found...
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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 499462" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>Nancy, </p><p>Thank you for the hug and the reminder that all of my "words" are not what will get young difficult child sober. </p><p></p><p>I have been in recovery many many years Nancy...Haven't been to a meeting though in around 5 yrs, since the psychotic break was so centered around G-d and the Devil...good and evil. It was horrifying and I was very involved with the "spiritual side" of the AA AL Anon program at the time. I guess I am concerned that if I start going back and get all wrapped up in it again that the same thing will happen to me again. I can't go through that, I almost died...or could have accidentally killed someone else while having the psychotic break: I had every kind of hallucination you can imagine. All the people I loved "looked" like the "devil" except, strangely enough, for young difficult child and easy child. I tried to grab a police officers gun to shoot myself. I ran to a neighbor's backyard (because they had a white gate and I thought G-d was there) went to their back door while they pleaded for me to leave...anyway, it goes on and on and on. I was manic. What I think I should do is look into going to a co-dependency meeting or mental illness meetings as Rejectedmom has mentioned to me in the past. </p><p></p><p>Susie, </p><p>I DID send the letter to oldest difficult child...got his things back when he got out of prison. </p><p>Thank you for the compliments...You are a sweety. </p><p>Got another letter from young difficult child yesterday. He says his "mood is good". He has been drawing in jail and sent a nice little tapestry of sorts for his wife. </p><p></p><p>Buddy, </p><p>Thank you...I used to just pour myself out in writing. That was before the psychotic break and now being on Abilify. The Abilify has greatly reduced the "intensity of emotions". In many ways I am a happier, very much more so, stable person...but a part of me is gone too. Sometimes my husband tells me that he misses that "vibrant woman he married". It is a trade off...but one I am happy to have made (wish it hadn't come from a psycotic breakdown though). </p><p>I like the me that I am today...Not too extreme, but alas, my writing has suffered because of it. </p><p></p><p>Thank you guys for caring. </p><p>LMS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 499462, member: 3305"] Nancy, Thank you for the hug and the reminder that all of my "words" are not what will get young difficult child sober. I have been in recovery many many years Nancy...Haven't been to a meeting though in around 5 yrs, since the psychotic break was so centered around G-d and the Devil...good and evil. It was horrifying and I was very involved with the "spiritual side" of the AA AL Anon program at the time. I guess I am concerned that if I start going back and get all wrapped up in it again that the same thing will happen to me again. I can't go through that, I almost died...or could have accidentally killed someone else while having the psychotic break: I had every kind of hallucination you can imagine. All the people I loved "looked" like the "devil" except, strangely enough, for young difficult child and easy child. I tried to grab a police officers gun to shoot myself. I ran to a neighbor's backyard (because they had a white gate and I thought G-d was there) went to their back door while they pleaded for me to leave...anyway, it goes on and on and on. I was manic. What I think I should do is look into going to a co-dependency meeting or mental illness meetings as Rejectedmom has mentioned to me in the past. Susie, I DID send the letter to oldest difficult child...got his things back when he got out of prison. Thank you for the compliments...You are a sweety. Got another letter from young difficult child yesterday. He says his "mood is good". He has been drawing in jail and sent a nice little tapestry of sorts for his wife. Buddy, Thank you...I used to just pour myself out in writing. That was before the psychotic break and now being on Abilify. The Abilify has greatly reduced the "intensity of emotions". In many ways I am a happier, very much more so, stable person...but a part of me is gone too. Sometimes my husband tells me that he misses that "vibrant woman he married". It is a trade off...but one I am happy to have made (wish it hadn't come from a psycotic breakdown though). I like the me that I am today...Not too extreme, but alas, my writing has suffered because of it. Thank you guys for caring. LMS [/QUOTE]
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