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adilt daughter on her ion stealing me blind, and moved boyfriend in. Give me advive
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 703554" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Welcome Donna, I'm so sorry you had to find us here but glad you did. You will find the support here that you need and no one here will judge you. </p><p></p><p>I'm glad that you have told your daughter and her boyfriend to leave your home. Our homes should be a place that we feel safe and your daughter has shown total disrespect for you and your home. When our adult children are addicted they only think of themselves and how they are going to get their next fix. As you have learned they do not have any problem stealing from us. The fact that she and the boyfriend were dealing drugs from your home put you at risk. If the police were to have come to your home and found this was going on you would be looking at criminal charges because it's your home. </p><p></p><p>Now that you have told your daughter that she can no longer stay at your home she is going to ramp it up. Her behavior is very typical of an adult difficult child. They will tell us the most ugly hurtful things in hopes that we will feel so bad that we will give into them. This is where we as the parents have to develop a really thick skin. Do not allow her to suck you into the dark vortex of questioning whether you were a good parent. The fact that you found this site tells me that you are a loving and good parent. Parents that don't care do not come here. As parents we have all made mistakes but none of them warrant the disrespect that they show to us. At some point our children start making decisions for themselves. </p><p>Your daughter blaming you for her drug addiction is also typical behavior. I highly doubt that you tied her down and forced drugs into her system. Your daughter made a choice, a very poor choice to engage in using drugs. You have offered her help with rehab but until she wants to change nothing will change for her.</p><p></p><p>I know this is hard for you. It's heartbreaking watching our children self destruct. It's not easy to accept that we have no power over them or the choices they make in how they are living their lives but it is through acceptance that we can move on. </p><p></p><p>If you have not done so, I highly suggest you attend an Al-Anon meeting. Here is a link to find a meeting. <a href="http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/find-a-meeting" target="_blank">http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/find-a-meeting</a></p><p></p><p>I also suggest you read this article on detachment. <a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/#axzz4RFnWXChn" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/#axzz4RFnWXChn</a></p><p></p><p>Detaching does not mean that we no longer love our adult difficult child, it just means that we no longer allow them to hold our emotions hostage and abuse us.</p><p></p><p>The most important thing is that you need to take care of yourself. You need to feel safe in your home. If your daughter continues to try and get in our hang around you may have to call the police. </p><p></p><p>Please keep posting and let us know how things are going, we really do care.</p><p></p><p>((HUGS)) to you................................</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 703554, member: 18516"] Welcome Donna, I'm so sorry you had to find us here but glad you did. You will find the support here that you need and no one here will judge you. I'm glad that you have told your daughter and her boyfriend to leave your home. Our homes should be a place that we feel safe and your daughter has shown total disrespect for you and your home. When our adult children are addicted they only think of themselves and how they are going to get their next fix. As you have learned they do not have any problem stealing from us. The fact that she and the boyfriend were dealing drugs from your home put you at risk. If the police were to have come to your home and found this was going on you would be looking at criminal charges because it's your home. Now that you have told your daughter that she can no longer stay at your home she is going to ramp it up. Her behavior is very typical of an adult difficult child. They will tell us the most ugly hurtful things in hopes that we will feel so bad that we will give into them. This is where we as the parents have to develop a really thick skin. Do not allow her to suck you into the dark vortex of questioning whether you were a good parent. The fact that you found this site tells me that you are a loving and good parent. Parents that don't care do not come here. As parents we have all made mistakes but none of them warrant the disrespect that they show to us. At some point our children start making decisions for themselves. Your daughter blaming you for her drug addiction is also typical behavior. I highly doubt that you tied her down and forced drugs into her system. Your daughter made a choice, a very poor choice to engage in using drugs. You have offered her help with rehab but until she wants to change nothing will change for her. I know this is hard for you. It's heartbreaking watching our children self destruct. It's not easy to accept that we have no power over them or the choices they make in how they are living their lives but it is through acceptance that we can move on. If you have not done so, I highly suggest you attend an Al-Anon meeting. Here is a link to find a meeting. [URL]http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/find-a-meeting[/URL] I also suggest you read this article on detachment. [URL]http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/#axzz4RFnWXChn[/URL] Detaching does not mean that we no longer love our adult difficult child, it just means that we no longer allow them to hold our emotions hostage and abuse us. The most important thing is that you need to take care of yourself. You need to feel safe in your home. If your daughter continues to try and get in our hang around you may have to call the police. Please keep posting and let us know how things are going, we really do care. ((HUGS)) to you................................ [/QUOTE]
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adilt daughter on her ion stealing me blind, and moved boyfriend in. Give me advive
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