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Parent Emeritus
Adult children who stop talking to you
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 385752" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Raven</p><p></p><p>Sounds like you are dealing with 2 difficult children with their own issues. Is there any history of mental health issues on either side of the family? I'm thinking ex most likely had something going on hence the drinking whether it was diagnosed or not. And unfortunately difficult child son has followed in his dad's footsteps and is doing drugs. Is that your fault? No. You could've left him when they were very very small and had the same turn out unless he had no contact whatsoever with biodad. (and heck even that wouldn't have been a guarantee) </p><p></p><p>We can only do the best we can with what we know at the time.</p><p></p><p>Do they have a relationship with their dad? They may also want you to stay in the familiar enabler role and be angry when you don't. That isn't your fault either. We can't change anyone else, we can only change ourselves. Sounds like they each have a lot to come to terms with. I'm sorry their choosing to blame you for someone else's behavior.</p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 385752, member: 84"] Raven Sounds like you are dealing with 2 difficult children with their own issues. Is there any history of mental health issues on either side of the family? I'm thinking ex most likely had something going on hence the drinking whether it was diagnosed or not. And unfortunately difficult child son has followed in his dad's footsteps and is doing drugs. Is that your fault? No. You could've left him when they were very very small and had the same turn out unless he had no contact whatsoever with biodad. (and heck even that wouldn't have been a guarantee) We can only do the best we can with what we know at the time. Do they have a relationship with their dad? They may also want you to stay in the familiar enabler role and be angry when you don't. That isn't your fault either. We can't change anyone else, we can only change ourselves. Sounds like they each have a lot to come to terms with. I'm sorry their choosing to blame you for someone else's behavior. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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