Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Adult daughter stole entire life savings
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="jeanne in CA" data-source="post: 629429" data-attributes="member: 18036"><p>My oh my, I simply cannot get over how kind and wise and articulate you all are. I am so appreciative of all of your posts and the specific suggestions. I will read and reread until everything sinks in. </p><p> </p><p>COM- you spoke of creating a wall, putting everything in a box and getting rid of it. Your words stuck hom in that I believe that that is exactly what my husband has done and I have not been able to do yet. Sometimes he is quicker than I in knowing how to take care of himself. On the other hand, I am the one still dealing with the police (as late as yesterday), the tax situation (a nightmare that will not quit), and all of the other accoutrements her actions have blessed us with. </p><p> </p><p>I totally agree with you that there is hope, and I do have faith that the right things will happen at some point. The waiting is so difficult as I am sure you know. It is tough to think of starting over but I have been working hard on creating new memories without her and trying to wipe out the thousands of hours we spent together in what I thought was a close loving relationship over the years. Our children are our hearts. I realize that I have to think in the concrete terms that you describe, namely, we did our job and it is over. The rest is up to them. On the other hand, I can't feel that my job is over until she is held accountable for what she has done. </p><p> </p><p>You say this is now part of our story. How about that? We get to star in a drama that we never even auditioned for. And, we, like so many of you, had neither the desire nor the experience to handle. This is truly a learn as you go effort. We don't ask for this story and we can hate it as much as we want, but it is still ours. You are correct, there is a great life out there and we intend to ease back into it. I say ease back into it because we are unable to do anything else while everything else is still pending. Bankruptcy, taxes, police investigation and upcoming arrest etc. have a way of putting a damper on things but I am determined to make every effort to ensure that she takes nothing else from us. </p><p> </p><p>RE- You are so right that being busy has been such a blessing. As much as I have felt every painful discovery, it would have been much worse to be idle and just wondering and worrying. You speak of nourshing oneself and creating a balance. There are probably few mothers out there who know exactly how to do that all the time. I know I have not. I recognize the words but they have had no meaning until just recently. In a way, I may have thought that by staying busy and staying focused I was taking care of myself. I felt that any truth was better than no truth and although I stilll feel that way, I can see that my tolerance for the naked truth has waned as things have continued to pile up. </p><p> </p><p>You speak of continuing to put my thoughts in writing and seek comfortand support. Even that is difficult because I sometimes feel like doing so is self-serving and without definite purpose. However, I have learned throughout this past year that seeking help from the forensic psychiatrist, my cousin a psychologist, and even a few trusted family members and friends have provided not only comfort but practical ideas and thoughts. That has been invaluable. Your point about creating a balance struck home with me. The psychatrist told me the same thing but for some reason it did not resonate until I read your post. Thank you for that. </p><p> </p><p>Helpangel- thank you so much for your kind words and your suggestion for the melatonin. I will try that right away since I hate taking so much Tylenol PM. </p><p> </p><p>I was going to describe a couple of other occurrences here but don't want to make my posts so long. I will limit myself to one and send it separately. Thank you all again so much.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jeanne in CA, post: 629429, member: 18036"] My oh my, I simply cannot get over how kind and wise and articulate you all are. I am so appreciative of all of your posts and the specific suggestions. I will read and reread until everything sinks in. COM- you spoke of creating a wall, putting everything in a box and getting rid of it. Your words stuck hom in that I believe that that is exactly what my husband has done and I have not been able to do yet. Sometimes he is quicker than I in knowing how to take care of himself. On the other hand, I am the one still dealing with the police (as late as yesterday), the tax situation (a nightmare that will not quit), and all of the other accoutrements her actions have blessed us with. I totally agree with you that there is hope, and I do have faith that the right things will happen at some point. The waiting is so difficult as I am sure you know. It is tough to think of starting over but I have been working hard on creating new memories without her and trying to wipe out the thousands of hours we spent together in what I thought was a close loving relationship over the years. Our children are our hearts. I realize that I have to think in the concrete terms that you describe, namely, we did our job and it is over. The rest is up to them. On the other hand, I can't feel that my job is over until she is held accountable for what she has done. You say this is now part of our story. How about that? We get to star in a drama that we never even auditioned for. And, we, like so many of you, had neither the desire nor the experience to handle. This is truly a learn as you go effort. We don't ask for this story and we can hate it as much as we want, but it is still ours. You are correct, there is a great life out there and we intend to ease back into it. I say ease back into it because we are unable to do anything else while everything else is still pending. Bankruptcy, taxes, police investigation and upcoming arrest etc. have a way of putting a damper on things but I am determined to make every effort to ensure that she takes nothing else from us. RE- You are so right that being busy has been such a blessing. As much as I have felt every painful discovery, it would have been much worse to be idle and just wondering and worrying. You speak of nourshing oneself and creating a balance. There are probably few mothers out there who know exactly how to do that all the time. I know I have not. I recognize the words but they have had no meaning until just recently. In a way, I may have thought that by staying busy and staying focused I was taking care of myself. I felt that any truth was better than no truth and although I stilll feel that way, I can see that my tolerance for the naked truth has waned as things have continued to pile up. You speak of continuing to put my thoughts in writing and seek comfortand support. Even that is difficult because I sometimes feel like doing so is self-serving and without definite purpose. However, I have learned throughout this past year that seeking help from the forensic psychiatrist, my cousin a psychologist, and even a few trusted family members and friends have provided not only comfort but practical ideas and thoughts. That has been invaluable. Your point about creating a balance struck home with me. The psychatrist told me the same thing but for some reason it did not resonate until I read your post. Thank you for that. Helpangel- thank you so much for your kind words and your suggestion for the melatonin. I will try that right away since I hate taking so much Tylenol PM. I was going to describe a couple of other occurrences here but don't want to make my posts so long. I will limit myself to one and send it separately. Thank you all again so much. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Adult daughter stole entire life savings
Top