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Adult daughter stole entire life savings
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<blockquote data-quote="jeanne in CA" data-source="post: 629430" data-attributes="member: 18036"><p><strong>The confrontation- </strong>I first confronted our daughter on March 28, 2013 after I learned about the $400 withdrawal made with my stolen ATM card. She had just returned from PA to CA and I was still at the house in PA intending to return to CA within the next few days. I told her I knew she was behind that theft as well as others. Over the next three days she texted her dad and me several times with abusive, outrageous claims. She accused me of making “a mess of all her hard work” and still maintained that she had “additional proof” that she was not responsible for any of the financial problems we had been dealing with. She claimed she was “done with me” and that “I was on my own from then on.” She kept saying that she could not believe how I could hurt her like that when “all she had done was work so hard to help us both.” She actually said, “I have not had parents for a long time and will continue to do without.” At the same time she still wanted me to go with her to the financial institutions to meet with the people she had been dealing with on my behalf “get the facts straight.” (I knew by that time that all the documents she had given me and all the people she had supposedly dealt with were her own fabrications.) She emphasized over and over that she was “not a monster” and that she would never forgive me for hurting her like this. She texted her dad and, among other things, told him that she was done helping us with discounted plane tickets and trying to keep me from having a “freaking mental breakdown.” That text alone confirmed that she could see how mentally fragile I was at the time. For her to know that, and for her to know that she alone was the cause is still difficult for me to process.</p><p>After confronting her on the phone, I flew back to CA on April 3 with my stomach in knots. I dreaded every aspect of coming home, knowing that I would have to face her, face her dad, and face the truth of everything that had happened to him and me under my watch.</p><p>It was late when my husband picked me up so we didn’t discuss anything that night. In the morning I told him what I had discovered, which was essentially that I had proof that she had embezzled thousands of dollars from at several of my accounts and I was not sure how many of our accounts together had been affected. I told him about the fabricated emails, letters, documents, and bank representatives she had created. It was the most difficult conversation I have ever had in my entire life. I was shaking as if I had palsy. Not only was I telling him about what all she had done, I was telling him that he and I were in severe financial trouble. Little did I know how severe. It was clear to him that I had trusted her and relied on her for “help” rather than either handle things myself or come to him for assistance. I was not going to get into the rationale for not doing either at that point. I was too drained. I told him that I instructed her to show up that morning with either her husband or an attorney in tow so we could discuss the extent of her actions and develop a plan. We got up and got dressed and waited in silence. The tension was unbearable.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jeanne in CA, post: 629430, member: 18036"] [B]The confrontation- [/B]I first confronted our daughter on March 28, 2013 after I learned about the $400 withdrawal made with my stolen ATM card. She had just returned from PA to CA and I was still at the house in PA intending to return to CA within the next few days. I told her I knew she was behind that theft as well as others. Over the next three days she texted her dad and me several times with abusive, outrageous claims. She accused me of making “a mess of all her hard work” and still maintained that she had “additional proof” that she was not responsible for any of the financial problems we had been dealing with. She claimed she was “done with me” and that “I was on my own from then on.” She kept saying that she could not believe how I could hurt her like that when “all she had done was work so hard to help us both.” She actually said, “I have not had parents for a long time and will continue to do without.” At the same time she still wanted me to go with her to the financial institutions to meet with the people she had been dealing with on my behalf “get the facts straight.” (I knew by that time that all the documents she had given me and all the people she had supposedly dealt with were her own fabrications.) She emphasized over and over that she was “not a monster” and that she would never forgive me for hurting her like this. She texted her dad and, among other things, told him that she was done helping us with discounted plane tickets and trying to keep me from having a “freaking mental breakdown.” That text alone confirmed that she could see how mentally fragile I was at the time. For her to know that, and for her to know that she alone was the cause is still difficult for me to process. After confronting her on the phone, I flew back to CA on April 3 with my stomach in knots. I dreaded every aspect of coming home, knowing that I would have to face her, face her dad, and face the truth of everything that had happened to him and me under my watch. It was late when my husband picked me up so we didn’t discuss anything that night. In the morning I told him what I had discovered, which was essentially that I had proof that she had embezzled thousands of dollars from at several of my accounts and I was not sure how many of our accounts together had been affected. I told him about the fabricated emails, letters, documents, and bank representatives she had created. It was the most difficult conversation I have ever had in my entire life. I was shaking as if I had palsy. Not only was I telling him about what all she had done, I was telling him that he and I were in severe financial trouble. Little did I know how severe. It was clear to him that I had trusted her and relied on her for “help” rather than either handle things myself or come to him for assistance. I was not going to get into the rationale for not doing either at that point. I was too drained. I told him that I instructed her to show up that morning with either her husband or an attorney in tow so we could discuss the extent of her actions and develop a plan. We got up and got dressed and waited in silence. The tension was unbearable. [/QUOTE]
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