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Adult daughter stole entire life savings
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<blockquote data-quote="jeanne in CA" data-source="post: 629432" data-attributes="member: 18036"><p>The encounter continued along similar lines and both her voice and her dad's escalated until she finally said “I’m not saying anything else because you will hold it against me.” At one point I separated the two of them for fear of upsetting the baby. The baby was going back and forth between the three of us until I sent my husband into the living room to calm down. Then she was handed back and forth between our daughter and me like she was playing a game, until our daughter would no longer allow her to come to me. At one point our daughter wanted to leave and I calmly told her she could not leave and take the baby while she, herself, was so upset. Within a few minutes she calmed down and I knew I had no choice but to let her take the baby and leave. As they were walking to her car, I realized that she had left behind a suitcase full of items that she had asked me to bring her from PA when I returned. I wheeled the suitcase out to the car and said, “Here. You forgot this.” She looked at me one last time and asked, “So do I really need to get an attorney?” I said, “I certainly would if I were you.”</p><p>Over the course of the next few days I was extremely anxious and stressed out over the confrontation and my clear expectation that I would hear from her. I had no idea what more to say to her since I was already discovering more theft. We both expected to hear from her husband and were both stressed out over what we would have to tell him about what she had done. When he did not return the voice mail my husband had left, he and I both followed up with text messages about a week apart. We never heard back from either one of them.</p><p>I could go on forever regarding the “games and vignettes” but after a while, it takes more energy than I am willing to expend. One could reasonably ask why l spent so much time with her if she was so mean. Of course, in many cases I did not learn of her actions until after I discovered the identity theft. Also, she wasn’t always mean. More often than not she was funny and fun to be around. I needed a distraction from the aftermath of my mom’s death and in the face of all these problems, and she and the baby provided that. I felt that it was time well spent because they needed me also. I took care of the baby, helped clean the house, did mountains of laundry, and sometimes cooked for them.</p><p>Spending time with them was a much-needed diversion for me and simultaneously provided us time to work on “my problems.” I would bring my laptop over to their house and write letters and emails etc., while she would make calls supposedly on my behalf. I traveled with a constant list of things to do each day. If she got testy or said something mean, I attributed it the fact that I was creating problems for her and she was frustrated. I felt so unbelievably guilty all the time. I just kept thinking that here she was with a husband, a home, a child and her own business, and I was burdening her with my problems. Whenever I told her that, she would reassure me that she really wanted to help me and enjoyed our time together. The truth was that I felt I needed her help, and without it, I would be left alone to fight these never-ending battles. We were finally friends and I was so proud of her and who she had become. I certainly did not realize that her offers of “help” were designed to perpetrate her cover-up of the ongoing theft, control the information that came to me, manipulate events so that I was unaware of her duplicity, and---I now believe---keep me off-balance emotionally so that I was more vulnerable, more gullible, and more eager to accept her assistance.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jeanne in CA, post: 629432, member: 18036"] The encounter continued along similar lines and both her voice and her dad's escalated until she finally said “I’m not saying anything else because you will hold it against me.” At one point I separated the two of them for fear of upsetting the baby. The baby was going back and forth between the three of us until I sent my husband into the living room to calm down. Then she was handed back and forth between our daughter and me like she was playing a game, until our daughter would no longer allow her to come to me. At one point our daughter wanted to leave and I calmly told her she could not leave and take the baby while she, herself, was so upset. Within a few minutes she calmed down and I knew I had no choice but to let her take the baby and leave. As they were walking to her car, I realized that she had left behind a suitcase full of items that she had asked me to bring her from PA when I returned. I wheeled the suitcase out to the car and said, “Here. You forgot this.” She looked at me one last time and asked, “So do I really need to get an attorney?” I said, “I certainly would if I were you.” Over the course of the next few days I was extremely anxious and stressed out over the confrontation and my clear expectation that I would hear from her. I had no idea what more to say to her since I was already discovering more theft. We both expected to hear from her husband and were both stressed out over what we would have to tell him about what she had done. When he did not return the voice mail my husband had left, he and I both followed up with text messages about a week apart. We never heard back from either one of them. I could go on forever regarding the “games and vignettes” but after a while, it takes more energy than I am willing to expend. One could reasonably ask why l spent so much time with her if she was so mean. Of course, in many cases I did not learn of her actions until after I discovered the identity theft. Also, she wasn’t always mean. More often than not she was funny and fun to be around. I needed a distraction from the aftermath of my mom’s death and in the face of all these problems, and she and the baby provided that. I felt that it was time well spent because they needed me also. I took care of the baby, helped clean the house, did mountains of laundry, and sometimes cooked for them. Spending time with them was a much-needed diversion for me and simultaneously provided us time to work on “my problems.” I would bring my laptop over to their house and write letters and emails etc., while she would make calls supposedly on my behalf. I traveled with a constant list of things to do each day. If she got testy or said something mean, I attributed it the fact that I was creating problems for her and she was frustrated. I felt so unbelievably guilty all the time. I just kept thinking that here she was with a husband, a home, a child and her own business, and I was burdening her with my problems. Whenever I told her that, she would reassure me that she really wanted to help me and enjoyed our time together. The truth was that I felt I needed her help, and without it, I would be left alone to fight these never-ending battles. We were finally friends and I was so proud of her and who she had become. I certainly did not realize that her offers of “help” were designed to perpetrate her cover-up of the ongoing theft, control the information that came to me, manipulate events so that I was unaware of her duplicity, and---I now believe---keep me off-balance emotionally so that I was more vulnerable, more gullible, and more eager to accept her assistance. [/QUOTE]
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Adult daughter stole entire life savings
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