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After they've left home...
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 138318" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>I was married to a cheapskate -- probably his only real flaw. I finally had a total hissy fit and we came up with a "compromise." I'd get $25/week (I'd raise it to $100/wk given the price of things today) to squirrel away for whatever I wanted -- a birthday present for me, an unexpected stop on the way home for a cuppa, to get a ride on a banana boat on vacation, something I wanted just because I wanted it. It ended up stopping a few battles and made things a little more fun. husband considered it part of the monthly budget so it wasn't an issue for him and it gave us a chance to do things I wanted and he couldn't grouse about the cost.</p><p> </p><p>As to your daughter and the debating thing -- mine's like that, too. If I want to get a point across that is not debatable, it is now prefaced that there will be no discussion, no debate on this one. It is a black and white issue, so nothing that she will say will make a bit of difference. If she does try to start arguing the point after that statement, I simply repeat my statement ("No guests to be brought home without prior permission by me.") and walk away. If she keeps following me, I don't say a word and just leave. It's so nice when they're old enough to leave at home alone.</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes I think our kids act the way they do deliberately. Sometimes it is done with no thought. Sometimes they are truly clueless when merrily walking all over us. Today's generation really has the best sense of entitlement of any past generation of the middle class -- it reminds me of what I've read of French royalty immediately pre-revolution. Until they are truly on their own with no mommy and daddy ready to bail them out, they have no clue how hard it can be to survive. It's part of what has brought on this housing mess -- kids think they should own a home without saving for a down payment and really can't make the monthly payment and banks bending over backwards to give it to them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 138318, member: 3626"] I was married to a cheapskate -- probably his only real flaw. I finally had a total hissy fit and we came up with a "compromise." I'd get $25/week (I'd raise it to $100/wk given the price of things today) to squirrel away for whatever I wanted -- a birthday present for me, an unexpected stop on the way home for a cuppa, to get a ride on a banana boat on vacation, something I wanted just because I wanted it. It ended up stopping a few battles and made things a little more fun. husband considered it part of the monthly budget so it wasn't an issue for him and it gave us a chance to do things I wanted and he couldn't grouse about the cost. As to your daughter and the debating thing -- mine's like that, too. If I want to get a point across that is not debatable, it is now prefaced that there will be no discussion, no debate on this one. It is a black and white issue, so nothing that she will say will make a bit of difference. If she does try to start arguing the point after that statement, I simply repeat my statement ("No guests to be brought home without prior permission by me.") and walk away. If she keeps following me, I don't say a word and just leave. It's so nice when they're old enough to leave at home alone. Sometimes I think our kids act the way they do deliberately. Sometimes it is done with no thought. Sometimes they are truly clueless when merrily walking all over us. Today's generation really has the best sense of entitlement of any past generation of the middle class -- it reminds me of what I've read of French royalty immediately pre-revolution. Until they are truly on their own with no mommy and daddy ready to bail them out, they have no clue how hard it can be to survive. It's part of what has brought on this housing mess -- kids think they should own a home without saving for a down payment and really can't make the monthly payment and banks bending over backwards to give it to them. [/QUOTE]
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