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<blockquote data-quote="AppleCori" data-source="post: 669844" data-attributes="member: 16024"><p>Hi Carolita,</p><p></p><p>I'm glad you got the apartment notice filed.</p><p></p><p> Had a discussion not too long ago with some friends. The topic was 'What would you do if you found yourself jobless, homeless and without any money'. There were lots of creative solutions, lots of planning and thinking, lots of ideas back and forth.</p><p></p><p>But not once did anyone suggest crying to or threatening their parents as a solution. </p><p></p><p>I know it was all theoretical, but there are lots of ways that these middle-aged adults can solve their own problems, that don't include you doing it for them.</p><p></p><p>And if you do it for them, they will only learn that you will do it for them. There will always be a next time.</p><p></p><p>You already know this.</p><p></p><p>Have you seen the article on Detachment at the top of the Parent Emeritus forum? You need to read it. It is very helpful.</p><p></p><p>You need to brace yourself for the coming storm. They will soon have a phone. They will contact you and up the ante on their desperation, all designed to break you, to make you give them what they want. They will hound you unmercifully.</p><p></p><p>You need to have a plan. Anticipate what they might say, and have some answers ready. Short and sweet. No is a complete sentence. You don't have to explain yourself.</p><p></p><p>Hang up, block their phone if needed.</p><p></p><p>Stay with us. It helps.</p><p></p><p>Apple</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AppleCori, post: 669844, member: 16024"] Hi Carolita, I'm glad you got the apartment notice filed. Had a discussion not too long ago with some friends. The topic was 'What would you do if you found yourself jobless, homeless and without any money'. There were lots of creative solutions, lots of planning and thinking, lots of ideas back and forth. But not once did anyone suggest crying to or threatening their parents as a solution. I know it was all theoretical, but there are lots of ways that these middle-aged adults can solve their own problems, that don't include you doing it for them. And if you do it for them, they will only learn that you will do it for them. There will always be a next time. You already know this. Have you seen the article on Detachment at the top of the Parent Emeritus forum? You need to read it. It is very helpful. You need to brace yourself for the coming storm. They will soon have a phone. They will contact you and up the ante on their desperation, all designed to break you, to make you give them what they want. They will hound you unmercifully. You need to have a plan. Anticipate what they might say, and have some answers ready. Short and sweet. No is a complete sentence. You don't have to explain yourself. Hang up, block their phone if needed. Stay with us. It helps. Apple [/QUOTE]
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