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Substance Abuse
Am I enabling by feeding my son?
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 628944" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Stress Bunny is right. You seem very guilt ridden, and while I'm all for accepting your feelings, also guilt, guilt often isn't the best emotion to base your actions to.</p><p></p><p>However I do not agree with SB about you being guilty for your son's situation by 'enabling' him. While letting him take a shower or have a snack may not help him in the long term (or it might, if it helps him to get a job or feel more loved), it isn't hurting him either. You denying those things would likely not give him any push to make things happen to himself. If those kinds of pushes help him, simply being kicked out from home is certainly enough. Denying all help is not needed and will not solve any of his problems. </p><p></p><p>However these are things you have to make your decisions based on what you feel is appropriate. How much trouble it causes you or rest of the family to let him have a shower. If it is very inconvenient to you, that is a good reason to deny it. But unfortunately you would be fooling yourself if you would deny shower etc. because you would believe that would somehow make him behave in the way you are hoping he would.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 628944, member: 14557"] Stress Bunny is right. You seem very guilt ridden, and while I'm all for accepting your feelings, also guilt, guilt often isn't the best emotion to base your actions to. However I do not agree with SB about you being guilty for your son's situation by 'enabling' him. While letting him take a shower or have a snack may not help him in the long term (or it might, if it helps him to get a job or feel more loved), it isn't hurting him either. You denying those things would likely not give him any push to make things happen to himself. If those kinds of pushes help him, simply being kicked out from home is certainly enough. Denying all help is not needed and will not solve any of his problems. However these are things you have to make your decisions based on what you feel is appropriate. How much trouble it causes you or rest of the family to let him have a shower. If it is very inconvenient to you, that is a good reason to deny it. But unfortunately you would be fooling yourself if you would deny shower etc. because you would believe that would somehow make him behave in the way you are hoping he would. [/QUOTE]
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Am I enabling by feeding my son?
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