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<blockquote data-quote="skittles" data-source="post: 755943" data-attributes="member: 2484"><p>Thankyou for your thoughts, The frog in boiling water is a very apt description. This is a years long situation that has just slowly but surely deteriorated and my involvement in it has slowly become more and more emeshed. Three years ago I had been suffering from depression and anxiety for awhile, It got to the point that I finally sought professional help. between two years of medication and counselling, i’m feeling relatively healthy and happy. Far far more able to separate my being from her. And of course this had lead to huge backlash. When I was in therapy I was also Extracting myself from a similar emeshment in my sons life. That has gone far better as even with his problems he is healthy enough to be accepting of it and even welcoming of my stepping back.Not to imply that we’re at 100% there yet though. My son spent five years in prison so he is involved in the children’s life but it has been a struggle for him as She has thwarted him at every turn and his past makes him less than ideal candidate as a custodial parent. She is so angry and bitter because he left her. however the relationship between them was so bad even the kids didn’t want them to live together as they just fight all the time. The courts have recognized that the two of them cannot talk to each other, The court ordered CAS to provide drivers for visitation. currently my son is living with another girl that has three children, his girlfriend is a recovered addict but she is doing well, my son did ask for custody but the judge felt it was just trading one marginal situation for another and that five extra children would be far too much of a stressor on the new girlfriend given her recent recovery. at that time my son his new girlfriend had only been living togeather a short time, far too soon to consider it a stable family unit . Currently my son gets two of the children Saturday nights overnight, and the other three all day Sunday every other weekend. CAS and the children’s lawyer have been very happy with his care of, bond and interaction with them. I do expect as they get older, that the oldest boy may request live with his dad. I’m not sure what age they start to take the children’s opinions into consideration but he is 11 now and has expressed a wish to stay with his dad many times. At any rate you are right, I know they will keep myself and my son involved, I hope for the kids it’s enough.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skittles, post: 755943, member: 2484"] Thankyou for your thoughts, The frog in boiling water is a very apt description. This is a years long situation that has just slowly but surely deteriorated and my involvement in it has slowly become more and more emeshed. Three years ago I had been suffering from depression and anxiety for awhile, It got to the point that I finally sought professional help. between two years of medication and counselling, i’m feeling relatively healthy and happy. Far far more able to separate my being from her. And of course this had lead to huge backlash. When I was in therapy I was also Extracting myself from a similar emeshment in my sons life. That has gone far better as even with his problems he is healthy enough to be accepting of it and even welcoming of my stepping back.Not to imply that we’re at 100% there yet though. My son spent five years in prison so he is involved in the children’s life but it has been a struggle for him as She has thwarted him at every turn and his past makes him less than ideal candidate as a custodial parent. She is so angry and bitter because he left her. however the relationship between them was so bad even the kids didn’t want them to live together as they just fight all the time. The courts have recognized that the two of them cannot talk to each other, The court ordered CAS to provide drivers for visitation. currently my son is living with another girl that has three children, his girlfriend is a recovered addict but she is doing well, my son did ask for custody but the judge felt it was just trading one marginal situation for another and that five extra children would be far too much of a stressor on the new girlfriend given her recent recovery. at that time my son his new girlfriend had only been living togeather a short time, far too soon to consider it a stable family unit . Currently my son gets two of the children Saturday nights overnight, and the other three all day Sunday every other weekend. CAS and the children’s lawyer have been very happy with his care of, bond and interaction with them. I do expect as they get older, that the oldest boy may request live with his dad. I’m not sure what age they start to take the children’s opinions into consideration but he is 11 now and has expressed a wish to stay with his dad many times. At any rate you are right, I know they will keep myself and my son involved, I hope for the kids it’s enough. [/QUOTE]
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