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...and it all falls apart.
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 701097" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I sent it.</p><p></p><p>Yes, I know. Everyone agrees I shouldn't have sent it. I think he won't use it ALL for gas - I think he'll buy a pack of cigarettes with some of it. But I do think that a portion will go for gas, so I sent it.</p><p></p><p>I checked on line earlier today about the plasma thing. They require a SS card and a license - which he has - and a permanent residence and that he doesn't have. He said he set up an address with the shelter, but the plasma place wouldn't take a homeless shelter after he went there to try to donate. He said he tried to find a day labor place but hadn't been able to get work. Maybe he lied. Maybe he didn't. But it really doesn't matter anymore because regardless, I sent it.</p><p></p><p>I told him not to ask me for another penny. Not for any reason. I told him if Pueblo doesn't work out and he's stranded there and penniless, don't even ask me for a penny. Nothing. Because I won't do it again so he better make damn sure he has what the people want for gas. If he spends it and doesn't have it, don't ask for more. I love you but I'm done. No more. Period.</p><p></p><p>So. It's done. I know everyone agreed that not sending it was right...but regardless, it didn't feel right to not do it last night and I agonized over it and felt terrible. So it's done. This is about me, not him. Maybe I should have told him to walk. Maybe I should have hung up on him. Maybe I'm not strong enough to do what's best. Maybe I should block his numbers - though I can't block at work so that's never going to happen. Maybe I'm never going to be as "detached" as I should be. But I had to do what I could live with and I couldn't live with not giving him the means to get to a place where he could at least have a couch for a while and hopefully it'll work out. Maybe it won't. But nothing will change the fact that I feel better now. Maybe I should feel worse, but I don't.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 701097, member: 17309"] I sent it. Yes, I know. Everyone agrees I shouldn't have sent it. I think he won't use it ALL for gas - I think he'll buy a pack of cigarettes with some of it. But I do think that a portion will go for gas, so I sent it. I checked on line earlier today about the plasma thing. They require a SS card and a license - which he has - and a permanent residence and that he doesn't have. He said he set up an address with the shelter, but the plasma place wouldn't take a homeless shelter after he went there to try to donate. He said he tried to find a day labor place but hadn't been able to get work. Maybe he lied. Maybe he didn't. But it really doesn't matter anymore because regardless, I sent it. I told him not to ask me for another penny. Not for any reason. I told him if Pueblo doesn't work out and he's stranded there and penniless, don't even ask me for a penny. Nothing. Because I won't do it again so he better make damn sure he has what the people want for gas. If he spends it and doesn't have it, don't ask for more. I love you but I'm done. No more. Period. So. It's done. I know everyone agreed that not sending it was right...but regardless, it didn't feel right to not do it last night and I agonized over it and felt terrible. So it's done. This is about me, not him. Maybe I should have told him to walk. Maybe I should have hung up on him. Maybe I'm not strong enough to do what's best. Maybe I should block his numbers - though I can't block at work so that's never going to happen. Maybe I'm never going to be as "detached" as I should be. But I had to do what I could live with and I couldn't live with not giving him the means to get to a place where he could at least have a couch for a while and hopefully it'll work out. Maybe it won't. But nothing will change the fact that I feel better now. Maybe I should feel worse, but I don't. [/QUOTE]
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