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And so dawns another day......
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<blockquote data-quote="neednewtechnique" data-source="post: 73980" data-attributes="member: 3527"><p>Well, welcome to the board, I am so glad you found us, I hope that we can be a great support system for you!! Your post reminds me so much of when I first started searching and found this board. Believe me, I was here on an almost daily basis and it wasn't long before all these super parents had helped me find the CONFIDENCE I needed to tackle the challenge of raising difficult child's. </p><p></p><p>First of all, the biggest thing you must remember is whatever they say, you cannot take it personally. They are throwing insults and horrible things at you to get a reaction. You should not give her the benefit of knowing that she has hurt your feelings and if you try to separate yourself from it, eventually you will be able to take it and it really WON'T hurt your feelings. At first, it tore me up to hear our difficult child say such horrible things to me, because like you, I did not sign up for this, and when my husband asked about letting his daughter move in with us, I had NO IDEA what we were in for, but in his defense, neither did he. </p><p></p><p>Second of all, the greatest thing that saved our sanity was doing exactly what you did, go out and get a 4,000 square foot house. This gives everyone plenty of space and trust me, as bad as things are now, if all three of those kids and the rest of you were living in a place any smaller, the problems would be MUCH WORSE. Although it is a BEAR to keep up with so much house, I LOVE having the space and it has SAVED us from killing each other I think. </p><p></p><p>Are your grand children on any medications? Having the right amounts of the right types of medications can sometimes make all the difference in the world. If they are not on medications or you are of the preference not to medicate, then I would say weekly counseling and specialized behavior therapy programs are a MUST. </p><p></p><p>I am looking forward to getting to know you! Good luck with the grandbabies!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="neednewtechnique, post: 73980, member: 3527"] Well, welcome to the board, I am so glad you found us, I hope that we can be a great support system for you!! Your post reminds me so much of when I first started searching and found this board. Believe me, I was here on an almost daily basis and it wasn't long before all these super parents had helped me find the CONFIDENCE I needed to tackle the challenge of raising difficult child's. First of all, the biggest thing you must remember is whatever they say, you cannot take it personally. They are throwing insults and horrible things at you to get a reaction. You should not give her the benefit of knowing that she has hurt your feelings and if you try to separate yourself from it, eventually you will be able to take it and it really WON'T hurt your feelings. At first, it tore me up to hear our difficult child say such horrible things to me, because like you, I did not sign up for this, and when my husband asked about letting his daughter move in with us, I had NO IDEA what we were in for, but in his defense, neither did he. Second of all, the greatest thing that saved our sanity was doing exactly what you did, go out and get a 4,000 square foot house. This gives everyone plenty of space and trust me, as bad as things are now, if all three of those kids and the rest of you were living in a place any smaller, the problems would be MUCH WORSE. Although it is a BEAR to keep up with so much house, I LOVE having the space and it has SAVED us from killing each other I think. Are your grand children on any medications? Having the right amounts of the right types of medications can sometimes make all the difference in the world. If they are not on medications or you are of the preference not to medicate, then I would say weekly counseling and specialized behavior therapy programs are a MUST. I am looking forward to getting to know you! Good luck with the grandbabies! [/QUOTE]
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