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Parent Emeritus
And then I asked him to stop calling me.
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 619948" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>Trinity,</p><p></p><p>validation helps. Some one who has walked a similar path helps. I feel weird about refusing contact...like it is something I have to hide...in fact, other than SO, the forum is the only place I've said it "out loud". So hearing that others have made the same choice, that it played out over years, that you survived...that is very helpful.</p><p></p><p>Validation is the key word in so many ways. Our difficult child's refuse to validate us...often we are people who have contributed to that in other relationships in our lives, where we move, invisible, helpful, superior in our lack of neediness...unseen. Being seen and being validated is crucial to our sense of selves, and we have either thrown it away with both hands, or allowed people to invalidate our sense of selves...especially our difficult children.</p><p></p><p>So thank you, Trinity, for giving me that. </p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 619948, member: 17269"] Trinity, validation helps. Some one who has walked a similar path helps. I feel weird about refusing contact...like it is something I have to hide...in fact, other than SO, the forum is the only place I've said it "out loud". So hearing that others have made the same choice, that it played out over years, that you survived...that is very helpful. Validation is the key word in so many ways. Our difficult child's refuse to validate us...often we are people who have contributed to that in other relationships in our lives, where we move, invisible, helpful, superior in our lack of neediness...unseen. Being seen and being validated is crucial to our sense of selves, and we have either thrown it away with both hands, or allowed people to invalidate our sense of selves...especially our difficult children. So thank you, Trinity, for giving me that. Echo [/QUOTE]
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And then I asked him to stop calling me.
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