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Anguished Mother
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<blockquote data-quote="Sister's Keeper" data-source="post: 696335" data-attributes="member: 20051"><p>I am not seeking nor do I require approval for any choices I have made or will make in my life. I am also quite cognizant of the not too subtle disapproval in the form of attempting to shame or threaten people who have made, or needed to make different choices than you have. Please don't play head games. You don't frighten me with threats of "regret" or that my own children will do the same to me. If there is a point in my children's lives that it is in their best interests emotionally to separate from the family, I would rather have a happy, healthy child and me take the brunt of the pain, than have a child who is unhappy or does not feel peace in their lives because they feel an obligation.</p><p></p><p>As you have said, everyone makes choices in their lives based upon their own experiences. We all need to do what we need to do to be happy and healthy. I am sorry that you have been hurt by experiences in your life and they have, undoubtedly, colored your feelings on the matter, but the ominous statement, subtle and not so subtle, that our children will leave us or we will live a life of regret really aren't necessary.</p><p></p><p>We all make the choices we deem necessary to be whole, happy, and healthy. It is different for everyone as everyone's situations are different. </p><p></p><p>What works for you works for you and I am glad that it makes you happy, healthy, and whole, just, please, respect that not everyone's life situation is the same, nor should it be.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sister's Keeper, post: 696335, member: 20051"] I am not seeking nor do I require approval for any choices I have made or will make in my life. I am also quite cognizant of the not too subtle disapproval in the form of attempting to shame or threaten people who have made, or needed to make different choices than you have. Please don't play head games. You don't frighten me with threats of "regret" or that my own children will do the same to me. If there is a point in my children's lives that it is in their best interests emotionally to separate from the family, I would rather have a happy, healthy child and me take the brunt of the pain, than have a child who is unhappy or does not feel peace in their lives because they feel an obligation. As you have said, everyone makes choices in their lives based upon their own experiences. We all need to do what we need to do to be happy and healthy. I am sorry that you have been hurt by experiences in your life and they have, undoubtedly, colored your feelings on the matter, but the ominous statement, subtle and not so subtle, that our children will leave us or we will live a life of regret really aren't necessary. We all make the choices we deem necessary to be whole, happy, and healthy. It is different for everyone as everyone's situations are different. What works for you works for you and I am glad that it makes you happy, healthy, and whole, just, please, respect that not everyone's life situation is the same, nor should it be. [/QUOTE]
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