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General Parenting
Another horrific night - ending in cops and ambulance
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 527039" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Weary - gentle hugs to you. Sounds like a truly horrible evening. </p><p></p><p>I think you and husband need to come up with a very firm safety plan, and difficult child needs to be advised of it. At the first violent act, you need to be calling 911. Period. You have a right to be safe in your own home. There is absolutely no wiggle room on this, hon.</p><p></p><p>My son also never showed remorse. I think a big piece of the puzzle is that when he was going Mach 5 like a tornado through our home, throwing things, destroying things, assaulting me, he really just wasn't here. It was kinda scary - I could tell when he had completely lost control. Though his acts appeared intentional, I think he was autopilot raging, and he rarely remembered what he had done. Of course, there was the usual "it's *your" fault for" whatever, but.... lack of remorse is something I think is fairly common. Their thinking is that it's not their fault, if they even remember what they did. </p><p></p><p>Having a difficult child is luck of the draw - biological or adopted, I think when we have a child who has a significant disability, we all have those moments of "how the heck did we end up here?" Heck, I still have those moments and I've been doing the mom thing for over 23 years. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> </p><p></p><p>I hope you get a good chance to regroup today. Another suggestion, for you and husband - respite. I totally understand the toll this kind of situation takes on a marriage. It is *vital* that you and husband get time to nurture your own relationship. As you get hooked into home services, you need to ask for respite. If you can't get it through them, I would seriously looking into hiring someone on your own. </p><p></p><p>Again, gentle hugs to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 527039, member: 8"] Weary - gentle hugs to you. Sounds like a truly horrible evening. I think you and husband need to come up with a very firm safety plan, and difficult child needs to be advised of it. At the first violent act, you need to be calling 911. Period. You have a right to be safe in your own home. There is absolutely no wiggle room on this, hon. My son also never showed remorse. I think a big piece of the puzzle is that when he was going Mach 5 like a tornado through our home, throwing things, destroying things, assaulting me, he really just wasn't here. It was kinda scary - I could tell when he had completely lost control. Though his acts appeared intentional, I think he was autopilot raging, and he rarely remembered what he had done. Of course, there was the usual "it's *your" fault for" whatever, but.... lack of remorse is something I think is fairly common. Their thinking is that it's not their fault, if they even remember what they did. Having a difficult child is luck of the draw - biological or adopted, I think when we have a child who has a significant disability, we all have those moments of "how the heck did we end up here?" Heck, I still have those moments and I've been doing the mom thing for over 23 years. :winking: I hope you get a good chance to regroup today. Another suggestion, for you and husband - respite. I totally understand the toll this kind of situation takes on a marriage. It is *vital* that you and husband get time to nurture your own relationship. As you get hooked into home services, you need to ask for respite. If you can't get it through them, I would seriously looking into hiring someone on your own. Again, gentle hugs to you. [/QUOTE]
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Another horrific night - ending in cops and ambulance
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