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Any way to save this concert?
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 193748" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>I have taken both easy child and difficult child to concerts since they were really young. I think it is important to introduce a variety of music to the kids and by the time they are teenagers, they don't want to go. My kids are 6 years apart so I don't remember taking both at the same time to very many. </p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, our professional concerts start at 7:30pm (there are 5-6 per year) and this year they have moved across town so we will not be attending. Before last year, the time did not matter - the kids were fine with occassional late nights. Then last year, I would either run difficult child home at intermission and return myself if someone was home (we live 5 minutes away) or have someone pick him up at intermission, or just leave myself at intermission. This year difficult child needs to be sleeping at 8:00pm so even though most are Friday nights, they just won't work.</p><p> </p><p>As for behavior, I agree with meowbunny that once they are dressed, they may surprise you. I think if you start now to talk about it and discuss how people behave it may help. Stay positive, no "you can't run or climb." only "everyone walks and whispers" </p><p> </p><p>"I am going to a concert where people dress up and are super polite. We don't talk at all during the concert. We sit and listen to the most beautiful music. We say "thank you" and "excuse me" a lot. We are very kind to each other. It is very cool. I would love to take you both with me. If I do decide to take you, can you be very polite? You get to be just like all the gentlemen and ladies. What do you think? Can you do this?"</p><p> </p><p>As much as I believe kids should be involved, I also believe that they be removed at the first sign of disruption. So, have a Plan B ready. Sit between them during the concert. If you do need to remove them, be positive about the time you were there, "Weren't the dressess beautiful and the suites handsome? Did you like the music? How did the songs make you feel?" If you need to remove them, it will be because it was too much for them and it is o.k. you just hope they enjoyed the time they did get out of it.</p><p> </p><p>Continuously give them clues all night - whisper "Let's show everyone how we can walk to our seats. Tall and straight and polite." Praise them for good behavior, "That was so nice how you held the door open"</p><p> </p><p>Be confident - if the kids sense your nervousness, they will buy into it, but if they sense that you KNOW they can do this, they will.</p><p> </p><p>My difficult child used to refuse to leave at intermission because he thought it was rude to do so. Last year he had no problem doing so because he was tired. But he has sat through a variety of performances.</p><p> </p><p>When you have kids with you, you need to follow their lead. If they are not handling it, you must remove them even if it means you miss out. I know, I am very selfish in those situations and get very upset myself but I work hard to remind myself that I have to do what is best for my kids and chalk it up to yet another thing I sacrifice for them - I will have other opportunities.</p><p> </p><p>Again, I strongly believe kids should be given opportunities to attend all kinds of concerts, even classical, even black ties.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 193748, member: 5096"] I have taken both easy child and difficult child to concerts since they were really young. I think it is important to introduce a variety of music to the kids and by the time they are teenagers, they don't want to go. My kids are 6 years apart so I don't remember taking both at the same time to very many. Unfortunately, our professional concerts start at 7:30pm (there are 5-6 per year) and this year they have moved across town so we will not be attending. Before last year, the time did not matter - the kids were fine with occassional late nights. Then last year, I would either run difficult child home at intermission and return myself if someone was home (we live 5 minutes away) or have someone pick him up at intermission, or just leave myself at intermission. This year difficult child needs to be sleeping at 8:00pm so even though most are Friday nights, they just won't work. As for behavior, I agree with meowbunny that once they are dressed, they may surprise you. I think if you start now to talk about it and discuss how people behave it may help. Stay positive, no "you can't run or climb." only "everyone walks and whispers" "I am going to a concert where people dress up and are super polite. We don't talk at all during the concert. We sit and listen to the most beautiful music. We say "thank you" and "excuse me" a lot. We are very kind to each other. It is very cool. I would love to take you both with me. If I do decide to take you, can you be very polite? You get to be just like all the gentlemen and ladies. What do you think? Can you do this?" As much as I believe kids should be involved, I also believe that they be removed at the first sign of disruption. So, have a Plan B ready. Sit between them during the concert. If you do need to remove them, be positive about the time you were there, "Weren't the dressess beautiful and the suites handsome? Did you like the music? How did the songs make you feel?" If you need to remove them, it will be because it was too much for them and it is o.k. you just hope they enjoyed the time they did get out of it. Continuously give them clues all night - whisper "Let's show everyone how we can walk to our seats. Tall and straight and polite." Praise them for good behavior, "That was so nice how you held the door open" Be confident - if the kids sense your nervousness, they will buy into it, but if they sense that you KNOW they can do this, they will. My difficult child used to refuse to leave at intermission because he thought it was rude to do so. Last year he had no problem doing so because he was tired. But he has sat through a variety of performances. When you have kids with you, you need to follow their lead. If they are not handling it, you must remove them even if it means you miss out. I know, I am very selfish in those situations and get very upset myself but I work hard to remind myself that I have to do what is best for my kids and chalk it up to yet another thing I sacrifice for them - I will have other opportunities. Again, I strongly believe kids should be given opportunities to attend all kinds of concerts, even classical, even black ties. [/QUOTE]
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