Are constant aches and pains part of Gfgness?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Kjs, May 8, 2007.

  1. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    My difficult child ALWAYS has some kind of pain. Chest pain, side pain (under ribs), always has a headache, neck pain, ankle, back, hip. etc. Always something, sometimes a few. Now it is ankle, and back. Still see him poking at his rib area. had everything checked out over and over. All ok. the Ankle I know hurts, soccer hurt it, then baseball took off to run and did something to achilles. Headache is a given, as it is with myself and easy child.
    But these pains put him into panic mode. Over and over he asks if he is going to die, promise I won't die, promise etc! He has a bottle of advil at school as well has migrane prescrition. makes me wonder what school thinks.
  2. oceans

    oceans New Member

    This can be a part of anxiety and depression. I see that he has problems with both. My difficult child grew up with psychological pains.
  3. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I agree with Oceans. My difficult child 2, who also has anxiety and depression, had constant headaches and stomachaches until we stabilized her mood on her current medication mix. It also sounds as if your difficult child has an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) component to his anxiety (fear that he will die from his "illness"). I recommend checking in with his psychiatrist about your concerns.
  4. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    I did discuss his anxiety. I am just frustrated. psychiatrist put him on lexapro at that time. then he didn't sleep at all. psychiatrist then switched him to remerom and he became worse than ever as far as meltdowns. Many a day. So, psychiatrist took that away and wanted him to take abilify(sp?). difficult child will not take it. Any suggestions on other anxiety medication?
  5. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Atypical antipsychotics like Abilify can help with anxiety. Abilify and Geodon are the least likely to cause weight gain.

    The Benzodiazapines (Ativan, Klonopin, etc) also help with anxiety, but they can be addicting and should not be used longterm.

    Buspar can also help with anxiety.

    If Topamax is not helping with his migraines, there are other options. My difficult child 1 takes Propranolol for migraines with great results.
  6. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    I know that I have constant aches & pains - oh, that's not what you meant! :rofl: Sorry.

    kt is always on "high alert" anxiety wise. There are also many aches, pains & conditions. I have creams, salves & such; works pretty well as a placebo for her anxiety based complaints. I'm also pretty big on herbal teas.
  7. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Linda, you're a hoot!!!!!!

    I'll watch this thread with interest as difficult child falls into this category. Not that he always complains of pain, etc., but he always worries about a bump, a feeling, etc.

  8. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    There are non-medication ways to work on anxiety. You can use them as well as using medication, to give everything a chance. It's not a quick fix, and if he's getting overloaded with stress you may not be able to keep up with trying to counter it all, but every little bit helps.

    difficult child 3's psychologist put him onto breathing exercises and meditation to help with his stress. Cognitive behaviour therapy is good, too. I find a mix of medication and meditation is fabulous - you use one to boost the other. Take the medications and immediately go into a meditation exercise - by the time you get to the peak of the visualisation, the medication should be beginning to work and should develop a conditioned response.

    The aches and pains might be imagined, but they're very real to him. Also, never rule out a possible physical cause (other than muscle tension as a result of anxiety). We have three out of four kids, plus husband, with over-relaxed joints. This is leading to early arthritis even in difficult child 3. And I do think there's a connection - the kids who are worst are my difficult child kids. easy child's not got the pain problems.

  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I had always been an extreme hypochondriac as a kid. I was told that this is a sign of childhood depression. I had/have geenralized anxiety disorder and panic disorder as well as a mood disorder. A great combination for becoming a hypochondriac :smile:
  10. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    My difficult child has always had an atypical amount of somatic complaints. That comes with the territory with depression and anxiety. As her depression is flaring up, so are her aches and pains. Yesterday alone it was headache, sore throat, ears hurt, knees hurt, wrist hurt, hand felt numb. We go through thermometers like you wouldn't believe. They are very real aches and pains, too, not just made up. But they are a symptom of their illness. When I was severely depressed, I would even run a low grade fever. It's very stressful for the body. Depression has been linked to such things as heart disease, so it's serious stuff. Read this study by the Cleveland Clinic:

    difficult child's pediatrician rx'd nausea medications. We also use tylenol, relaxation, ice packs and heating pads.
  11. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    difficult child 3 runs a low grade fever with anxiety. He still takes his temperature obsessively, but now I tell him, "It's OK, honey, it's just your anxiety, you know you can keep going through it. Keep doing your schoolwork, but you can snuggle under a blanket if you like."

    Before, he would insist that sick kids can't do schoolwork, but he hates falling behind and so he now accepts that he can keep working through a fever. If he falls asleep I let him sleep, but that's also when I figure it's something more than anxiety.

  12. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    I thought it was just him. He has so much stress (most brought on by himself at school), so much anxiety. but everything hurts. we even have TWO thermometers and he will use both to make sure he is ok. One is an ear one and one is a mouth one.

    Dr. did give us abilify as a trial, but difficult child refuses anymore medication. Didn't tell him this, but reading about it scares me too.

    Meditation...that wouldn't work. Only when he is really mad, then I am sure he is not thinking positive peaceful thoughts.

    He loves the smell of candles, incense. Maybe I will look into some aroma
  13. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    For meditation to work you have to build it up, begin when cam and do it regularly (at least once a day, before bedtime is good) because you can NEVR begin a series of meditation therapies when you most need it - you have to already have the skill and practice.

    Aromatherapy - if he will let you touch him, massage is good, even if all you do is massage his hands or his feet (or shoulders). difficult child 3 got a bit sunburnt and I used the excuse to massage in some coconut oil scented with sandalwood. I also have some rose-scented coconut oil (the coconut smell has been removed) and this is a better scent for relaxation, although a bit 'girly'.
    Lavender is brilliant for relaxation. It's good in a massage oil, or a few drops in bathwater is good for relaxation. An oil burner with lavender is also good, but make sure it doesn't aggravate him - this can happen with some people.

    For boys, lavender is a good choice. Other good oils to include are rose (a small amount can be slipped in with lavender), sandalwood (go easy on it), patchouli. For a more stimulating mix, use a citrus -scented oil like lime, bergamot (also OK for boys) and neroli. The more floral oils need the woody notes for boys to not feel self-conscious. Also, don't mix more than two or three oils. Use a vegetable oil base, with only a few drops of essential oil to about 50 ml of vegetable oil (as a massage oil). For the bathwater - don't add more than about five drops. The same with the oil burner. You will soon work out what you and he can tolerate. And do try to get pure essential oils, avoid anything labelled "scented oil", "massage oil", "fragrance oil". The woody oils (patchouli, sandalwood, ti-tree or melaleuca, eucalyptus) are also antifungal and antiseptic. The last two are also good for chest and head colds, but go very easy on them, especially eucalyptus - too much can burn your nostrils and they're toxic if swallowed. Ti-tree oil is almost magic on skin inflammation and brilliant on burns). Rosemary oil is great for the hair - 1 part rosemary oil to 4 parts almond oil makes a good scalp rub.

    Pure essential oils are very expensive, depending on how rare they are or how difficult to extract. Pure rose oil (attar) is unbelievably expensive. Lavender is quite inexpensive - about $20 for an ounce or so. Eucalyptus & ti-tree are even cheaper, because it's so easy to extract and down here we have forests full of it - you can see the air shimmer with the blue haze of oil. We've even been playing with extracting some of it ourselves at home, just for the exercise. Keep essential oils in a cool dark place. Browse the internet to get a feel for prices, so you don't get ripped off or sold inferior oils.

    Basically, I would suggest you go very carefully and slowly, he may not cope with strong smells. A tiny amount externally is safe, so start very small and see how he goes.