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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Are there any guidelines for kicking the addict out of the house?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 603571" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Welcome. I'm sorry you're experiencing this with your daughter, it's a positive sign that you and your wife are on the same page, presenting a united front is important. Kathy gave you good advice, first find out what you have to do legally to evict your daughter. Here in CA. you have to get legal paperwork completed and there is a time period, I believe it's 30 days. You can then have a Sheriff escort them out. </p><p></p><p>What many parents here have done is to set the boundary that they are comfortable with, in your case it's inpatient or eviction, you will know at that point what the eviction laws are and you say, "you have a choice, inpatient or eviction. If you do not choose inpatient, you have X amount of time to get your stuff together, find a place to live, get a job, etc." Then you hold that line and don't waver. You may want to do some research into restraining orders and local shelters so you are armed with all the necessary information you will need. </p><p></p><p>As you know, our adult kids who are using are remarkably manipulative, so she will likely escalate and use whatever manipulations have worked in the past and then she will up the ante. Be prepared. Many of us seek out professional help, attend al-non meetings, parent groups, therapy, whatever it takes for us to hang tough and learn the tools of detachment. You may get some value out of the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here. </p><p></p><p>If your daughter has emotional and or mental issues, you could also try NAMI, National Alliance on Mental Illness, they are a great resource for parents. You can access them online, they have chapters everywhere. Good luck. This is a difficult path for us parents, it helps to keep posting. We understand your anger and your anguish.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 603571, member: 13542"] Welcome. I'm sorry you're experiencing this with your daughter, it's a positive sign that you and your wife are on the same page, presenting a united front is important. Kathy gave you good advice, first find out what you have to do legally to evict your daughter. Here in CA. you have to get legal paperwork completed and there is a time period, I believe it's 30 days. You can then have a Sheriff escort them out. What many parents here have done is to set the boundary that they are comfortable with, in your case it's inpatient or eviction, you will know at that point what the eviction laws are and you say, "you have a choice, inpatient or eviction. If you do not choose inpatient, you have X amount of time to get your stuff together, find a place to live, get a job, etc." Then you hold that line and don't waver. You may want to do some research into restraining orders and local shelters so you are armed with all the necessary information you will need. As you know, our adult kids who are using are remarkably manipulative, so she will likely escalate and use whatever manipulations have worked in the past and then she will up the ante. Be prepared. Many of us seek out professional help, attend al-non meetings, parent groups, therapy, whatever it takes for us to hang tough and learn the tools of detachment. You may get some value out of the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here. If your daughter has emotional and or mental issues, you could also try NAMI, National Alliance on Mental Illness, they are a great resource for parents. You can access them online, they have chapters everywhere. Good luck. This is a difficult path for us parents, it helps to keep posting. We understand your anger and your anguish. [/QUOTE]
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Are there any guidelines for kicking the addict out of the house?
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