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Are You Raising Someone elses Child?
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 524397" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>I am an adoptive mom so technically he was someone else's child but of course he is my child since I accepted placement. He just yesterday figured out he had his brain surgery before I adopted him. (LOL, he was saying if I would not have allowed it then he would have that part of his brain because he is so desperately wanting to not have his "issues' right now.... well first of all, he would not be alive, and secondly I was not around to have any say..."oh"---big news to him, though not the first time we have discussed it, I think it was the first time he understood since he is much older now).</p><p></p><p>I think those of you who take care of/raise grands are amazing. Not that I think I would do any differently--there is a connection I suppose that would make it hard NOT to do it. I was cared for by my grandmother for extended times when I was young. My mom was ill so one grand took my sister as a baby/toddler and the other took me because she had a daughter only four years older than I. It is such a sweet and amazing bond to be able to connect with grandparents. (and I know there are aunts/uncles who do the same).... </p><p></p><p>Step parents who fully take on the role are awesome to me too. I have a step mother and she had no children of her own. She did not try to be our mother but she loves us and treats us the same. She has pictures of all of our kids ....her grandkids... at work. She gives us money in emergencies, drives us to the hospital if needed etc.... and has never tried to take over our mother's role. She did not have to raise us, but I really do appreciate from the "child's" perspective (two sisters were young when my dad married) that she took on the role she did. Only my youngest sister had difficult child-like issues but nothing like what we talk about here really....no rebelling or opposition, mostly depression/anxiety (still that way as I have shared, but a very responsible mom). They worked as a team and I learned a lot from them about unconditional love.</p><p></p><p>Just wanted to say, I can imagine it is hard but I have no real clue how hard, and I really admire that you stepped up as you all did.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 524397, member: 12886"] I am an adoptive mom so technically he was someone else's child but of course he is my child since I accepted placement. He just yesterday figured out he had his brain surgery before I adopted him. (LOL, he was saying if I would not have allowed it then he would have that part of his brain because he is so desperately wanting to not have his "issues' right now.... well first of all, he would not be alive, and secondly I was not around to have any say..."oh"---big news to him, though not the first time we have discussed it, I think it was the first time he understood since he is much older now). I think those of you who take care of/raise grands are amazing. Not that I think I would do any differently--there is a connection I suppose that would make it hard NOT to do it. I was cared for by my grandmother for extended times when I was young. My mom was ill so one grand took my sister as a baby/toddler and the other took me because she had a daughter only four years older than I. It is such a sweet and amazing bond to be able to connect with grandparents. (and I know there are aunts/uncles who do the same).... Step parents who fully take on the role are awesome to me too. I have a step mother and she had no children of her own. She did not try to be our mother but she loves us and treats us the same. She has pictures of all of our kids ....her grandkids... at work. She gives us money in emergencies, drives us to the hospital if needed etc.... and has never tried to take over our mother's role. She did not have to raise us, but I really do appreciate from the "child's" perspective (two sisters were young when my dad married) that she took on the role she did. Only my youngest sister had difficult child-like issues but nothing like what we talk about here really....no rebelling or opposition, mostly depression/anxiety (still that way as I have shared, but a very responsible mom). They worked as a team and I learned a lot from them about unconditional love. Just wanted to say, I can imagine it is hard but I have no real clue how hard, and I really admire that you stepped up as you all did. [/QUOTE]
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