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Parent Emeritus
as someone said about leading a horse to water....
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 42290" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Once again, it is your choice for your life.</p><p></p><p>on the other hand, I do not see the situation the way you do. Even if it were</p><p>my husband of thirty years...I still would not only "allow" him to make those choices, I would "encourage" him to follow his own</p><p>instincts. His children deserve to have him available without</p><p>worrying about anything else. </p><p></p><p>I have three steps. One would always want me there if at all</p><p>possible...which is very rare. One also "loves" me and is happy</p><p>when I join his Dad visiting. The third one (the oldest) would</p><p>be fine if she never saw me again but treats me with courtesy</p><p>when we are together.........very very very rarely.</p><p></p><p>They had their Dad first and have shared many years with him</p><p>before their Mom found a new SO. I am not privy to the little</p><p>wonderful memories from early childhood that are part of their</p><p>being. Likewise, my children and I fondly recall so many years</p><p>of sharing long before I met husband.</p><p></p><p>Personally I think it is OK to have more than one "best friend"</p><p>so long as your current "best friend" is valued appropriately.</p><p>husband and I shared middle age as a unit and we are sharing old age</p><p>as a unit. The kids aren't (lucky for them) part of those more</p><p>stressful years. on the other hand it is music to my ears when I hear them</p><p>giggling talking to their Dad. It makes them all feel young again. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 42290, member: 35"] Once again, it is your choice for your life. on the other hand, I do not see the situation the way you do. Even if it were my husband of thirty years...I still would not only "allow" him to make those choices, I would "encourage" him to follow his own instincts. His children deserve to have him available without worrying about anything else. I have three steps. One would always want me there if at all possible...which is very rare. One also "loves" me and is happy when I join his Dad visiting. The third one (the oldest) would be fine if she never saw me again but treats me with courtesy when we are together.........very very very rarely. They had their Dad first and have shared many years with him before their Mom found a new SO. I am not privy to the little wonderful memories from early childhood that are part of their being. Likewise, my children and I fondly recall so many years of sharing long before I met husband. Personally I think it is OK to have more than one "best friend" so long as your current "best friend" is valued appropriately. husband and I shared middle age as a unit and we are sharing old age as a unit. The kids aren't (lucky for them) part of those more stressful years. on the other hand it is music to my ears when I hear them giggling talking to their Dad. It makes them all feel young again. DDD [/QUOTE]
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as someone said about leading a horse to water....
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