Better than expected

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Malika, Sep 4, 2012.

  1. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    J's first day at "big school" today. I was honestly dreading it, rather, as he has been refusing to do any kind of concentrated work and been throwing out lots of statements about how he doesn't want to do any work at school but only play, etc. Anyway, I picked him up for lunch and he was calm and happy - said the new (male) teacher said he had done very well, that he liked school, liked work and was looking forward to lots of dictations (something they do a lot of in France)! Not bad for someone who can't write and recognises about a dozen letters :) Same story at the end of the day - school was nice, the teacher was nice (much better than the previous one, he said), he liked the work...
    Early days, of course, but I wonder if I dare hope that school will be okay for him and not the nightmare it so often seems to be for ADHD kids?
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Malika - the biggest single issue at school with ADHD kids is... the relationship they have with the teacher. If the kid and the teacher "click", the kid does just fine. If they don't, well, you have some idea about what happens next.

    Why? Not sure all of the reasons, but ADHD kids thrive on positive feedback loops, and teachers (being human) give more positive feedback to kids they click with.
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Glad things went well today!!
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Totally agree that the teacher is the ticket! His tone will also guide how other staff and kids treat J. I remember hearing some kids yell at Q and thinking that it sounded just like their teacher. It never hurts to suck up a little to the teacher too....studies prove that teachers who get little notes, signs of appreciation really do treat the student/family who gives it better ( as well as kids who are dressed/groomed nicely...pretty sad but just what studies show in general). I figure our kids can use any of the help they can get from us, of course only if it is genuine and not overdone---after all, many of them do start off in the hole a little.

    Anyway, I get that it is hard to be too positive since we often have to protect ourselves for challenges that arise, but you can enjoy that it is starting off in a great direction. I hope J has a marvelous year!
  5. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    That must have been it, then, Buddy - yesterday J was wearing brand new clothes (as befits a first day of the school year) and brand new shoes, with brand new school bag, pencil case and provisions, so was very smart! Seriously, I know nothing about this brand new (also) teacher and can only hope he has an inkling about special needs unlike the previous teacher and maybe even understands a little about ADHD. I will have at some point to go in to see him and brief him, maybe set up a meeting with the child pyschiatrist and the school team, but for the moment I will just let things unfold and see how they go.