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The Watercooler
Big hugs to all on "this day"
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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 110217" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>Well.........of course I jinxed myself when I said difficult child was calm. Now, he is having one of his epic meltdowns.......just like every Cmas. He is screaming that he hates himself and wants to die. </p><p></p><p>God, and, now I am right there with him. I tried so hard to be happy, and peaceful, and positive, and now I would just rather disappear into oblivion. OMG, why? Why can't I just have one day of peace? Just this one day?</p><p></p><p>Now we are both sobbing, and crying.......and, I know, both wishing that there was just one more person that cared enough to give us a hug and make this cmas different. I have not even made a dinner yet, and I guess I won't. I mean, I guess even to have little trinkets of cmas stuff is just too much. I am so, so, so tired - and yet I am trying so, so, so hard. </p><p></p><p>My dad has been helping me out the last couple of years financially while I tried to take some time to care for difficult child. Now my dad has brain cancer. I have to make enough money for us again.........and deal with a house, and a difficult child, and, well everything. It just all seems like SO much sometimes. Like me getting the flu, AND doing all of this.........or falling and smashing my knee......but needing to go stand on my feet all day as a retail manager. It just all seems like TOO much for one person sometimes. But yet, it has to happen. Where is my prince? </p><p></p><p>I know, now I have done a complete 180, and reverted to whining and feeling sorry for myself. I will keep trekking the trek........I know how to do it.........just don't wanna sometimes.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 110217, member: 3301"] Well.........of course I jinxed myself when I said difficult child was calm. Now, he is having one of his epic meltdowns.......just like every Cmas. He is screaming that he hates himself and wants to die. God, and, now I am right there with him. I tried so hard to be happy, and peaceful, and positive, and now I would just rather disappear into oblivion. OMG, why? Why can't I just have one day of peace? Just this one day? Now we are both sobbing, and crying.......and, I know, both wishing that there was just one more person that cared enough to give us a hug and make this cmas different. I have not even made a dinner yet, and I guess I won't. I mean, I guess even to have little trinkets of cmas stuff is just too much. I am so, so, so tired - and yet I am trying so, so, so hard. My dad has been helping me out the last couple of years financially while I tried to take some time to care for difficult child. Now my dad has brain cancer. I have to make enough money for us again.........and deal with a house, and a difficult child, and, well everything. It just all seems like SO much sometimes. Like me getting the flu, AND doing all of this.........or falling and smashing my knee......but needing to go stand on my feet all day as a retail manager. It just all seems like TOO much for one person sometimes. But yet, it has to happen. Where is my prince? I know, now I have done a complete 180, and reverted to whining and feeling sorry for myself. I will keep trekking the trek........I know how to do it.........just don't wanna sometimes. [/QUOTE]
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Big hugs to all on "this day"
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