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Birthparents issues with adopted kids
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<blockquote data-quote="mom_to_3" data-source="post: 221130" data-attributes="member: 30"><p>Or difficult child is adopted too. One thing I did from a young age was to tell my difficult child that her birth mother was just that and *I* was her real mother. Never a negative word about her birth mother. It was probably about your daughters age, that mine also took great interest in her birth mother. I never did feel threatened by her curiosity, I don't know why really, except that I would have probably been curious myself if I had been adopted. I have read other adoptive parents feel they way you do. I agree that your daughter is too young to meet her birth mother. I would tell your daughter in a positive way that you will definitely and happily help her connect with her birth mother when she is 18 yrs.</p><p></p><p>I bet your daughter is trying to process the info about her adoption and trying to figure out who she is and who she relates to. By acting angry towards her birth mother, she may be trying to protect your feelings without really knowing it.</p><p></p><p>Don't worry............ she'll always be your daughter and you her real mother.</p><p></p><p>I forgot to add.......... My difficult child has met her bio mother. They really don't get along because they are very much alike, both very demanding of attention. They do still talk though. Actually, I am happy for her. If it can give my difficult child any sense of peace, I am happy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mom_to_3, post: 221130, member: 30"] Or difficult child is adopted too. One thing I did from a young age was to tell my difficult child that her birth mother was just that and *I* was her real mother. Never a negative word about her birth mother. It was probably about your daughters age, that mine also took great interest in her birth mother. I never did feel threatened by her curiosity, I don't know why really, except that I would have probably been curious myself if I had been adopted. I have read other adoptive parents feel they way you do. I agree that your daughter is too young to meet her birth mother. I would tell your daughter in a positive way that you will definitely and happily help her connect with her birth mother when she is 18 yrs. I bet your daughter is trying to process the info about her adoption and trying to figure out who she is and who she relates to. By acting angry towards her birth mother, she may be trying to protect your feelings without really knowing it. Don't worry............ she'll always be your daughter and you her real mother. I forgot to add.......... My difficult child has met her bio mother. They really don't get along because they are very much alike, both very demanding of attention. They do still talk though. Actually, I am happy for her. If it can give my difficult child any sense of peace, I am happy. [/QUOTE]
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