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Both sons in prison/baby mama arrested
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 658903" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I think if the right supports were there, you could take him. He may be old enough for a school program and it might be good for him. I cannot remember the name right now though I know it is nationwide and one of our members worked with it for some time. It starts with 2 or 3 yo kids and provides a preschool program that is not a daycare type thing but goes until they start kindergarten. This would give you help during the day and open him up to all kinds of services. I think he NEEDS to be evaluated for special need ASAP. I especially think he needs an Occupational Therapist (OT) evaluation to help find the kinds of stimulation he needs to soothe himself. This helps you figure out safe activities to keep him from running off and harming himself. It might include putting a swing in your home or getting a treadmill for him to run on, or any number of other things.</p><p></p><p>I also think putting him on a regular schedule and using pictures on a poster board to show him what we do at what time will help greatly. This gives stability and it lets kids relax. It won't fix the hyperactiveness, but it could take the edge off of it.</p><p></p><p>I do thank the baby mama for the call, and the hotel staff and patrons for keeping an eye out for such an endangered little one.</p><p></p><p>I think if you could give him a few years of really meeting his needs it might make a HUGE difference in the long run. Some of it will depend on the amount of neglect and abuse he has already suffered, but he is still in the critical 0-3 year range where neglect and abuse can cause serious long term damage. Having his needs met in a very loving home for the next couple of years may be critical to his ability to attach to people, to develop empathy, and to have a conscious. </p><p></p><p>Foster care is not known for providing that kind of care. Special needs foster care is incredibly hard to come by and the risk of abuse and neglect in the foster care system is incredibly high. I have seen reports that put the risk of sexual abuse at anywhere from 35-75%+ and the risk of physical abuse is even higher. They don't even cite the risk of emotional abuse. I have to say I would search for another family member or put myself out t the utmost of my ability before my child went to foster care. It would be my absolute last resort. I know there are good people in foster care and that no one wants to think people go into foster care to hurt kids, but the system is so broken that I doubt it can be fixed. </p><p></p><p>I think the risks of abuse in foster care are much higher for special needs kids and would be especially high for your grandson. Given the running and the extreme hyperactivity and sleep issues, a foster parent would probably be more likely to either use unacceptable methods to stop this or they would quickly reach the end of their rope and lose it and lash out at the child. This would mean more frequent moves which would cause even more risk that he would never be able to attach to others in a healthy way, develop a conscience, or to develop empathy. </p><p></p><p>I know you don't want to hear that, and I hate that it is true. I do think that if you can get a good Occupational Therapist (OT) on board, they can find ways to channel his energy and his need for stimulation in ways that are far more manageable and livable. I urge you to read The Out of Sync Child and The Out of Sync Child Has Fun to find help with this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 658903, member: 1233"] I think if the right supports were there, you could take him. He may be old enough for a school program and it might be good for him. I cannot remember the name right now though I know it is nationwide and one of our members worked with it for some time. It starts with 2 or 3 yo kids and provides a preschool program that is not a daycare type thing but goes until they start kindergarten. This would give you help during the day and open him up to all kinds of services. I think he NEEDS to be evaluated for special need ASAP. I especially think he needs an Occupational Therapist (OT) evaluation to help find the kinds of stimulation he needs to soothe himself. This helps you figure out safe activities to keep him from running off and harming himself. It might include putting a swing in your home or getting a treadmill for him to run on, or any number of other things. I also think putting him on a regular schedule and using pictures on a poster board to show him what we do at what time will help greatly. This gives stability and it lets kids relax. It won't fix the hyperactiveness, but it could take the edge off of it. I do thank the baby mama for the call, and the hotel staff and patrons for keeping an eye out for such an endangered little one. I think if you could give him a few years of really meeting his needs it might make a HUGE difference in the long run. Some of it will depend on the amount of neglect and abuse he has already suffered, but he is still in the critical 0-3 year range where neglect and abuse can cause serious long term damage. Having his needs met in a very loving home for the next couple of years may be critical to his ability to attach to people, to develop empathy, and to have a conscious. Foster care is not known for providing that kind of care. Special needs foster care is incredibly hard to come by and the risk of abuse and neglect in the foster care system is incredibly high. I have seen reports that put the risk of sexual abuse at anywhere from 35-75%+ and the risk of physical abuse is even higher. They don't even cite the risk of emotional abuse. I have to say I would search for another family member or put myself out t the utmost of my ability before my child went to foster care. It would be my absolute last resort. I know there are good people in foster care and that no one wants to think people go into foster care to hurt kids, but the system is so broken that I doubt it can be fixed. I think the risks of abuse in foster care are much higher for special needs kids and would be especially high for your grandson. Given the running and the extreme hyperactivity and sleep issues, a foster parent would probably be more likely to either use unacceptable methods to stop this or they would quickly reach the end of their rope and lose it and lash out at the child. This would mean more frequent moves which would cause even more risk that he would never be able to attach to others in a healthy way, develop a conscience, or to develop empathy. I know you don't want to hear that, and I hate that it is true. I do think that if you can get a good Occupational Therapist (OT) on board, they can find ways to channel his energy and his need for stimulation in ways that are far more manageable and livable. I urge you to read The Out of Sync Child and The Out of Sync Child Has Fun to find help with this. [/QUOTE]
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Both sons in prison/baby mama arrested
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