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Bothered me so much I can't sleep (long)
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<blockquote data-quote="flutterbee" data-source="post: 170878"><p>You just got a good glimpse at how powerful AND overwhelming her anger is. While it s*cks and hurts to witness it and to be the brunt of it, it's good information to have. She's letting you know how intense her frustration and anger becomes. Isn't she on Abilify? I just talked to one person - albeit an adult - who was in a constant rage on that medication. I definitely think a medication check/change/tweak is in order.</p><p></p><p>As far as the candy...taking her bag was engaging her at her level. I would have instead sent her to sit on the couch until she gave the candy back or something like that. IOW, you don't get to have any fun until you give the candy back and meanwhile your friend is still here and still playing. She probably would have thrown a fit, but stay calm and be consistent. I know my kiddo would never rage as hard in front of a playmate. </p><p></p><p>I used to *hate* it when my mom said, "Because I'm the mom and I said so." But, I have to admit that I use it all. the. time. I learned early on that my kids thought *everything* was up for negotiation because I allowed it by engaging and listening to their reasons, etc. And it got really old really fast. Now, it's 'Because I'm the mom and I said so.' Period.</p><p></p><p>She's too young yet to have much insight into what causes all these feelings and her reactions. Once she gets to that point, you can really work with identifying the feelings and then learn tools to cope and to choose better behavior. Right now she's just reacting, but she probably can't really tell you why exactly. I know you are shocked and upset by her admission today. But, that is a very important piece of information to have. So, it was a good thing, too, that she said it, Know what I mean?? </p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterbee, post: 170878"] You just got a good glimpse at how powerful AND overwhelming her anger is. While it s*cks and hurts to witness it and to be the brunt of it, it's good information to have. She's letting you know how intense her frustration and anger becomes. Isn't she on Abilify? I just talked to one person - albeit an adult - who was in a constant rage on that medication. I definitely think a medication check/change/tweak is in order. As far as the candy...taking her bag was engaging her at her level. I would have instead sent her to sit on the couch until she gave the candy back or something like that. IOW, you don't get to have any fun until you give the candy back and meanwhile your friend is still here and still playing. She probably would have thrown a fit, but stay calm and be consistent. I know my kiddo would never rage as hard in front of a playmate. I used to *hate* it when my mom said, "Because I'm the mom and I said so." But, I have to admit that I use it all. the. time. I learned early on that my kids thought *everything* was up for negotiation because I allowed it by engaging and listening to their reasons, etc. And it got really old really fast. Now, it's 'Because I'm the mom and I said so.' Period. She's too young yet to have much insight into what causes all these feelings and her reactions. Once she gets to that point, you can really work with identifying the feelings and then learn tools to cope and to choose better behavior. Right now she's just reacting, but she probably can't really tell you why exactly. I know you are shocked and upset by her admission today. But, that is a very important piece of information to have. So, it was a good thing, too, that she said it, Know what I mean?? (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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