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<blockquote data-quote="PatriotsGirl" data-source="post: 563153"><p>Thank you for checking in - I am still processing. I do believe what she told me. difficult child told me that they were who she went and lived with when she left home. She did bad things for them. She was a part of their family. (Drug shipments, sales, etc.) I don't think she is lying. We had a very long heart to heart where she finally filled in missing holes of her life after she left and how badly she regrets not living a normal life - how badly she wished she stayed in school and went off to college. She regrets ever touching meth. I can <em>hear</em> it in her voice. I honestly think if she could go back in time, she would do it all so differently. Normally, I can at least <em>sense</em> BS from my child. I may normally want to believe her, but my mommy instinct usually knows better or at least suspects something is up. She told me how her heart dropped when that man called and gave her the address of where she is staying, telling difficult child that they know she sent letters to A hole in jail. I could hear the fear in her voice.</p><p></p><p>So, I don't know what to do. I don't know what I <em>can</em> do. I told her she needs to check in with me daily - even if it is just a text, so I know she is okay. She is totally and completely willing to submit to a drug test and I may pop her with one just for my own peace of mind. If she relapses, I will be able to tell looking at her. I could tell after she relapsed last time. I didn't want to believe it was true, but it was confirmed later. She stands firm that she absolutely hated the feeling when she relapsed. I told her as long as she is not active in her addiction, I wanted her in my life. But if she becomes an active user again, I will need to distance myself from her again. </p><p></p><p>Of course this could all be a total snow job by difficult child and if it is, she should win an academy award for it. But no matter what, we are protected here. We believe in our right to bear arms and I am applying for my license to carry. </p><p></p><p>Anyone have any advice on this one? My boundaries are up - I have not given her anything, nor do I plan to. But I don't want her out of my life if she is truly not using...I feel she deserves the benefit of the doubt until/unless she proves me wrong. I just don't know what else I can do. If she is telling the truth, that they know where she was, I am certainly not going to take the chance on forcing her to go back.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PatriotsGirl, post: 563153"] Thank you for checking in - I am still processing. I do believe what she told me. difficult child told me that they were who she went and lived with when she left home. She did bad things for them. She was a part of their family. (Drug shipments, sales, etc.) I don't think she is lying. We had a very long heart to heart where she finally filled in missing holes of her life after she left and how badly she regrets not living a normal life - how badly she wished she stayed in school and went off to college. She regrets ever touching meth. I can [I]hear[/I] it in her voice. I honestly think if she could go back in time, she would do it all so differently. Normally, I can at least [I]sense[/I] BS from my child. I may normally want to believe her, but my mommy instinct usually knows better or at least suspects something is up. She told me how her heart dropped when that man called and gave her the address of where she is staying, telling difficult child that they know she sent letters to A hole in jail. I could hear the fear in her voice. So, I don't know what to do. I don't know what I [I]can[/I] do. I told her she needs to check in with me daily - even if it is just a text, so I know she is okay. She is totally and completely willing to submit to a drug test and I may pop her with one just for my own peace of mind. If she relapses, I will be able to tell looking at her. I could tell after she relapsed last time. I didn't want to believe it was true, but it was confirmed later. She stands firm that she absolutely hated the feeling when she relapsed. I told her as long as she is not active in her addiction, I wanted her in my life. But if she becomes an active user again, I will need to distance myself from her again. Of course this could all be a total snow job by difficult child and if it is, she should win an academy award for it. But no matter what, we are protected here. We believe in our right to bear arms and I am applying for my license to carry. Anyone have any advice on this one? My boundaries are up - I have not given her anything, nor do I plan to. But I don't want her out of my life if she is truly not using...I feel she deserves the benefit of the doubt until/unless she proves me wrong. I just don't know what else I can do. If she is telling the truth, that they know where she was, I am certainly not going to take the chance on forcing her to go back. [/QUOTE]
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