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Substance Abuse
Can I trust her when she says she wants to change?
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<blockquote data-quote="SadFlower" data-source="post: 673756" data-attributes="member: 19741"><p>I ended up having daughter take a drug test and she tested positive for dexedrine. Fantastic. So she's not going anywhere this weekend, and frankly, I'm not all that certain about sending her to school on Monday. I'm going to ask my sister if she can stay with her during the morning. I really need to get my daughter out of this environment.</p><p></p><p>We had a big fight and I asked her why would she do that after telling me that she wants to change, and she screamed, "because I feel like <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />!". I think she was being honest and I later thanked her for being honest and telling me how she feels. I am definitely going to call again and see if they can speed things up and get us a meeting sooner. We were offered other kinds of help - the resource officer wrote daughter a referral to an outpatient program for teens with substance abuse problems - but I haven't called that place because I'm worried that it would just make things worse. Daughter might meet kids who are seriously addicted, which I don't think she is at this point, and who would teach her all kinds of negative behaviors. I really think that what daughter needs right now is supervision, therapy and being in a different environment where she could find a group of friends who would re-focus her on positive activities.</p><p></p><p>Daughter was adopted at 10 months old, and yes, the community we live in now is almost all-white. Daughter is one of six (!) Asian kids in her school, a large public school. I didn't want to move here because of this reason, but I didn't really have a choice. The private school I want to have her transfer into is still 90% white, but there are more than 20 Asians kids, including a few international students from China and Korea. I hope she will feel more comfortable there and meet nicer kids.</p><p></p><p>I strongly agree with you all about genetics. I don't know much about daughter's birthmother, but I do know that daughter shows a lot of traits that she definitely didn't get from us. She is extremely stubborn, opinionated, and tends to be a perfectionist. The way she views the world is just so different. I would love to meet her birthmother, and I would love for daughter to meet her - but I don't think this is the right time. Once we get through this mess, we could start searching and preparing, but now... it could be too much. </p><p></p><p>Take care everyone, and again, thank you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SadFlower, post: 673756, member: 19741"] I ended up having daughter take a drug test and she tested positive for dexedrine. Fantastic. So she's not going anywhere this weekend, and frankly, I'm not all that certain about sending her to school on Monday. I'm going to ask my sister if she can stay with her during the morning. I really need to get my daughter out of this environment. We had a big fight and I asked her why would she do that after telling me that she wants to change, and she screamed, "because I feel like :censored2:!". I think she was being honest and I later thanked her for being honest and telling me how she feels. I am definitely going to call again and see if they can speed things up and get us a meeting sooner. We were offered other kinds of help - the resource officer wrote daughter a referral to an outpatient program for teens with substance abuse problems - but I haven't called that place because I'm worried that it would just make things worse. Daughter might meet kids who are seriously addicted, which I don't think she is at this point, and who would teach her all kinds of negative behaviors. I really think that what daughter needs right now is supervision, therapy and being in a different environment where she could find a group of friends who would re-focus her on positive activities. Daughter was adopted at 10 months old, and yes, the community we live in now is almost all-white. Daughter is one of six (!) Asian kids in her school, a large public school. I didn't want to move here because of this reason, but I didn't really have a choice. The private school I want to have her transfer into is still 90% white, but there are more than 20 Asians kids, including a few international students from China and Korea. I hope she will feel more comfortable there and meet nicer kids. I strongly agree with you all about genetics. I don't know much about daughter's birthmother, but I do know that daughter shows a lot of traits that she definitely didn't get from us. She is extremely stubborn, opinionated, and tends to be a perfectionist. The way she views the world is just so different. I would love to meet her birthmother, and I would love for daughter to meet her - but I don't think this is the right time. Once we get through this mess, we could start searching and preparing, but now... it could be too much. Take care everyone, and again, thank you. [/QUOTE]
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