RN0441
100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
I haven't posted much about us lately and haven't been on as often as I like due to changes.
In the past eight weeks we have relocated to the shores of Alabama; relocating for my job.
My husband has been back and forth between here and Chicago since our house sale fell through and he had not yet secured work here.
Today he is on his drive here to live permanently!! I am overjoyed. We finally sold the house after discounting it deeply and he was able to find a job here through someone from his past that is now a national sales manager. I am not meant to be alone. I have met some nice people here thankfully but still missed him being here with me.
Our son continues to keep in touch. He is in the final phase of his program. He is working almost full time and paying his own way there. He has to give 10% to the church and 15% for his food and shelter and he gets an allowance and the rest they save for him. He will receive a check on his graduation day which is November 17. He is also very involved in working out and healthy living. Our middle son is also into health and fitness and he said he is inspired by that.
He has grown in so many ways. He just turned 23 a few weeks ago. He has had at least 3 birthdays spent in a rehab program of some type - not consecutive but still.... Sad but true. Heartbreaking but true. He has been sober since September of 2017.
He is ready to come home now but I have told him that he must finish the program and graduate. He is frustrated with "community living" as he calls it. I have been struggling with him returning to our home. His dad had promised him that he could come to live with us if he finished this program. Not permanently but that we would be supportive as long as he was working on becoming a productive SOBER member of society.
He is anxious to find a "good" job as he calls it and explore school and other things. He will continue to work on his sobriety and is planning to join our church and small groups and also attend Celebrate Recovery at a nearby church. I told him I will not police his addiction. It is on him to manage this.
We are excited to have him back in our lives. He is our only son together and we have been cut to the core by all that we have been through and he has been through due to his addiction. We are ready to move forward as a family. He is a funny guy and has a big and gentle heart.
I am blessed that my new coworker (and her husband) ran the Celebrate Recovery program in her church for many years. Although she has not had addiction touch her personally, she is very knowledgeable on the subject and has helped guide me through this. I know that me being here in Alabama isn't by accident. I know that having her in my life isn't by accident either.
I knew that we had to have a list of rules for him to come back to our home. I felt it would not be fair to him NOT to know what we expect of him. I decided yesterday that he needed to write the rules that he thought should be put in place but of course the final word is ours.
He felt that is our home and that we should make the rules for our home but when I explained that we wanted to be fair to all he agreed to work on this. I think this will make him really think about things that maybe he has not thought about. He is young and with addiction since the age of 15, it means we are not truly dealing with a 23 year old brain.
We are going to see him in a few weeks and bring our dogs. He hasn't seen them in over two years. He will get a 24 hour pass so I told him to plan things he wants to do. It's a five hour drive for us each way so doable on the weekend.
I have not seen him since May due to our move even though my husband did spend a few days with him in June and brought him to the town we live in now so that he could look around. I am looking forward to our visit.
I do not know how this will all end but we are taking one day at a time which is all any of us can do. I am keeping the faith that this time will be different. We need a happy ending.
In the past eight weeks we have relocated to the shores of Alabama; relocating for my job.
My husband has been back and forth between here and Chicago since our house sale fell through and he had not yet secured work here.
Today he is on his drive here to live permanently!! I am overjoyed. We finally sold the house after discounting it deeply and he was able to find a job here through someone from his past that is now a national sales manager. I am not meant to be alone. I have met some nice people here thankfully but still missed him being here with me.
Our son continues to keep in touch. He is in the final phase of his program. He is working almost full time and paying his own way there. He has to give 10% to the church and 15% for his food and shelter and he gets an allowance and the rest they save for him. He will receive a check on his graduation day which is November 17. He is also very involved in working out and healthy living. Our middle son is also into health and fitness and he said he is inspired by that.
He has grown in so many ways. He just turned 23 a few weeks ago. He has had at least 3 birthdays spent in a rehab program of some type - not consecutive but still.... Sad but true. Heartbreaking but true. He has been sober since September of 2017.
He is ready to come home now but I have told him that he must finish the program and graduate. He is frustrated with "community living" as he calls it. I have been struggling with him returning to our home. His dad had promised him that he could come to live with us if he finished this program. Not permanently but that we would be supportive as long as he was working on becoming a productive SOBER member of society.
He is anxious to find a "good" job as he calls it and explore school and other things. He will continue to work on his sobriety and is planning to join our church and small groups and also attend Celebrate Recovery at a nearby church. I told him I will not police his addiction. It is on him to manage this.
We are excited to have him back in our lives. He is our only son together and we have been cut to the core by all that we have been through and he has been through due to his addiction. We are ready to move forward as a family. He is a funny guy and has a big and gentle heart.
I am blessed that my new coworker (and her husband) ran the Celebrate Recovery program in her church for many years. Although she has not had addiction touch her personally, she is very knowledgeable on the subject and has helped guide me through this. I know that me being here in Alabama isn't by accident. I know that having her in my life isn't by accident either.
I knew that we had to have a list of rules for him to come back to our home. I felt it would not be fair to him NOT to know what we expect of him. I decided yesterday that he needed to write the rules that he thought should be put in place but of course the final word is ours.
He felt that is our home and that we should make the rules for our home but when I explained that we wanted to be fair to all he agreed to work on this. I think this will make him really think about things that maybe he has not thought about. He is young and with addiction since the age of 15, it means we are not truly dealing with a 23 year old brain.
We are going to see him in a few weeks and bring our dogs. He hasn't seen them in over two years. He will get a 24 hour pass so I told him to plan things he wants to do. It's a five hour drive for us each way so doable on the weekend.
I have not seen him since May due to our move even though my husband did spend a few days with him in June and brought him to the town we live in now so that he could look around. I am looking forward to our visit.
I do not know how this will all end but we are taking one day at a time which is all any of us can do. I am keeping the faith that this time will be different. We need a happy ending.