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General Parenting
Changing my enabling ways....
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<blockquote data-quote="tiredmommy" data-source="post: 408367" data-attributes="member: 1722"><p>The hardest (& often best) thing a parent can do is act in their child's best longterm interests. We all hate to make our kids sad, upset or angry but you need to weigh the potential for future hurt against easy sailing today to be an effective parent, in my humble opinion. It's especially hard for the parents of difficult children, I think, because the line isn't so clear between what are kids are not capable of achieving and what they won't try to do. Sometimes their issues make it near impossible to shake out just what they are able to do. I also think we sometimes "clinicalize" negative behaviors & attitudes before we explore fully if our kids can do better. Not always, but sometimes. My take on it is that my child gets one go round in this life... so I better make sure she does absolutely as much as she's able to do or I've failed miserably as her parent. I often ask myself Fran's question: "Who does this serve?" in order to determine if I'm doing well as a parent. It is okay to answer "Me", or "husband" or "our family" rather than just "Duckie", but I must be truthful with myself so that we keep a healthy balance.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tiredmommy, post: 408367, member: 1722"] The hardest (& often best) thing a parent can do is act in their child's best longterm interests. We all hate to make our kids sad, upset or angry but you need to weigh the potential for future hurt against easy sailing today to be an effective parent, in my humble opinion. It's especially hard for the parents of difficult children, I think, because the line isn't so clear between what are kids are not capable of achieving and what they won't try to do. Sometimes their issues make it near impossible to shake out just what they are able to do. I also think we sometimes "clinicalize" negative behaviors & attitudes before we explore fully if our kids can do better. Not always, but sometimes. My take on it is that my child gets one go round in this life... so I better make sure she does absolutely as much as she's able to do or I've failed miserably as her parent. I often ask myself Fran's question: "Who does this serve?" in order to determine if I'm doing well as a parent. It is okay to answer "Me", or "husband" or "our family" rather than just "Duckie", but I must be truthful with myself so that we keep a healthy balance. [/QUOTE]
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Changing my enabling ways....
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