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General Parenting
Children repeatedly stealing from their parents
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 604538" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Bill, it may be prudent to post on Parent Emeritus since your daughter is an adult. Loving our children and enabling them are two very distinctly different things. Of course you love your daughter, however, by not allowing her to experience the natural consequences of her behavior, you rob her of a valuable adult experience which teaches us the results of our behavior so we can learn from our mistakes.........<em>or not</em>................AND, you allow negative, bad behavior to continue in your life. You will live with <u>exactly</u> what you allow, so do not allow this behavior. As others have said, take your receipt and try to get your Rolex back, turn your daughter in and perhaps you can advocate for her in the system to get her into rehab. </p><p></p><p>It is difficult to let our adult kids face the crummy consequences of their own choices, I understand that having a daughter myself who has made terrible choices.............and I enabled her for awhile too..............but what you are doing is not in any way healthy nor is it changing the issues. She is an adult woman who is making bad choices, at some point you need to let go and allow her to fall and face the music. It may be a good idea for you to get support, 12 step groups, private therapy, family anonymous, whatever works for you..............you may want to read the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here.........it's helpful. </p><p></p><p>What you are up against is tough, no doubt about it, but whatever happens to your daughter is a result of her choice, not of your parenting, or what you did or didn't do, or what you could have done, or anything about YOU, you didn't create this, nor can you change it, <em>nor can you fix it.</em> That is all up to her. Wishing you peace.........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 604538, member: 13542"] Bill, it may be prudent to post on Parent Emeritus since your daughter is an adult. Loving our children and enabling them are two very distinctly different things. Of course you love your daughter, however, by not allowing her to experience the natural consequences of her behavior, you rob her of a valuable adult experience which teaches us the results of our behavior so we can learn from our mistakes.........[I]or not[/I]................AND, you allow negative, bad behavior to continue in your life. You will live with [U]exactly[/U] what you allow, so do not allow this behavior. As others have said, take your receipt and try to get your Rolex back, turn your daughter in and perhaps you can advocate for her in the system to get her into rehab. It is difficult to let our adult kids face the crummy consequences of their own choices, I understand that having a daughter myself who has made terrible choices.............and I enabled her for awhile too..............but what you are doing is not in any way healthy nor is it changing the issues. She is an adult woman who is making bad choices, at some point you need to let go and allow her to fall and face the music. It may be a good idea for you to get support, 12 step groups, private therapy, family anonymous, whatever works for you..............you may want to read the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here.........it's helpful. What you are up against is tough, no doubt about it, but whatever happens to your daughter is a result of her choice, not of your parenting, or what you did or didn't do, or what you could have done, or anything about YOU, you didn't create this, nor can you change it, [I]nor can you fix it.[/I] That is all up to her. Wishing you peace......... [/QUOTE]
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