Malika,
It was my son, Ferb, who brought me to this forum years ago. I had read literally every single parenting book on the shelves at my local library and nothing worked. Nothing. He was angry; I was angry. We were miserable. My dear friend handed me a copy of The Explosive Child, and it was like the Holy Grail for me. I put as many things as I could into that basket B, and life slowly began to improve.
I was also extremely hard on the safety and medication issues. Over time, Ferb learned not to cross me in certain areas, but that other areas were more negotiable. For instance, he spent some time whacking his friends at playdates. Each and every time that happened, he had to give his friend a toy from his own toybox. I chose ones that he really liked, too. He had to give it to his friend and apologize in person. Quickly, he learned not to hit.
