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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
college age son (19) has pregnant girlfriend, has started smoking pot with buddies
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 507728" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>I am so sorry for your pain. Before I respond, I will tell you that my on is younger, so I have not walked in your shoes. Having said that, many of us have experienced the pain of watching our difficult child make bad choices and live a lifestyle that we as parents cannot support. Living in peace is all about honoring your OWN boundaries. You said that you made a deal with him based upon him using the house as a home, not a party hang out. In it's simplest form, it sounds like things have changed and it has turned into a party house. That is not what you agreed to support. Although you cannot force him to take his girlfriend back, you do not have to now support his party lifestyle, that's your boundary. Make it clear to him that you are not forcing him to do anything, but your agreement is based on supporting a start in his new HOME for he, his girlfriend and their baby. He is working, so he has some money. If he needs it for the car, he will have less for the drugs. You have to make them FEEL the choice of using drugs in every aspect of their lives.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 507728, member: 12490"] I am so sorry for your pain. Before I respond, I will tell you that my on is younger, so I have not walked in your shoes. Having said that, many of us have experienced the pain of watching our difficult child make bad choices and live a lifestyle that we as parents cannot support. Living in peace is all about honoring your OWN boundaries. You said that you made a deal with him based upon him using the house as a home, not a party hang out. In it's simplest form, it sounds like things have changed and it has turned into a party house. That is not what you agreed to support. Although you cannot force him to take his girlfriend back, you do not have to now support his party lifestyle, that's your boundary. Make it clear to him that you are not forcing him to do anything, but your agreement is based on supporting a start in his new HOME for he, his girlfriend and their baby. He is working, so he has some money. If he needs it for the car, he will have less for the drugs. You have to make them FEEL the choice of using drugs in every aspect of their lives. [/QUOTE]
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college age son (19) has pregnant girlfriend, has started smoking pot with buddies
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