Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Could use some support
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="donna723" data-source="post: 473256" data-attributes="member: 1883"><p>To someone who has never been through it themselves, it is unfathomable that someone would stay in an abusive relationship. Antsmom's list is a very good one. There are as many different reasons as there women! While it sounds so unreasonable to an outsider, you have to understand what happens when you've been in a relationship like this for years and years. Your self esteem and sense of self worth are completely gone, you start to believe all of the things you've been told for so long, you feel worthless and guilty and you really believe that you deserve the abuse that you have been getting. After a while you don't know which way is up anymore and you're so confused.</p><p></p><p>In my own case, I feel guilty now that I couldn't see the obvious and that I let it go on for so long when it was doing so much damage to my children. But for all those years he told me that all the problems in the family were MY fault. And he told me that the kids agreed with him that it was MY fault and he claimed that both of them had already told him that if we ever split up, they wanted to stay with him, not me. And I believed it. I really thought that my only two choices were to either endure life as it was or to lose my children and be completely alone. And I KNEW that I was the loving, caring, stable parent, the one they really needed. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out what I was doing that was so wrong but I knew that it must be something really awful! So it's very easy to look at someone in this situation and say, "Why doesn't she leave?" but it's very, very complicated and it's just not that easy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donna723, post: 473256, member: 1883"] To someone who has never been through it themselves, it is unfathomable that someone would stay in an abusive relationship. Antsmom's list is a very good one. There are as many different reasons as there women! While it sounds so unreasonable to an outsider, you have to understand what happens when you've been in a relationship like this for years and years. Your self esteem and sense of self worth are completely gone, you start to believe all of the things you've been told for so long, you feel worthless and guilty and you really believe that you deserve the abuse that you have been getting. After a while you don't know which way is up anymore and you're so confused. In my own case, I feel guilty now that I couldn't see the obvious and that I let it go on for so long when it was doing so much damage to my children. But for all those years he told me that all the problems in the family were MY fault. And he told me that the kids agreed with him that it was MY fault and he claimed that both of them had already told him that if we ever split up, they wanted to stay with him, not me. And I believed it. I really thought that my only two choices were to either endure life as it was or to lose my children and be completely alone. And I KNEW that I was the loving, caring, stable parent, the one they really needed. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out what I was doing that was so wrong but I knew that it must be something really awful! So it's very easy to look at someone in this situation and say, "Why doesn't she leave?" but it's very, very complicated and it's just not that easy. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Could use some support
Top