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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 590276" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>Your son is engaging in voyeurism. </p><p></p><p>Shame on him. </p><p></p><p>In being rude enough to bring it up to you (after he was rude enough to listen, in the first place) your own son is trying to denigrate the sacredness of your relationship with your S.O.! </p><p></p><p>He is taking a cheap shot at you as a woman. (One of the cheapest shots there is.) He is playing that same old game men play with women to rationalize their actions and behaviors so they can get what they want and walk away smelling like a rose while the woman's reputation suffers. </p><p></p><p>And why is he is layering this horror and shame onto you? So he can rationalize/justify how he is a man even though he is living with his mommy and not creating his own life. </p><p></p><p>Looking at your private life the way he is choosing to (and we have to remember that HE IS MAKING A CHOICE, HERE) enables him to change the focus of attention from his failure to thrive as an adult male. I agree with the others on this one: absolutely none of his business. That is why our children are supposed to be moved out by the time they are of an age to know what sex is.</p><p></p><p>Life is short. Celebrate living with and loving S.O. Enjoy everything you can, everything you have. Especially with children like ours, there is so much pain, there are so many disappointments. Joy is the one thing that keeps us sane, that helps us remember what life is supposed to feel like.</p><p></p><p>Don't let him take this from you, too. Don't let him dirty or change it. At bottom, the relationship you have with S.O. is sacred.</p><p></p><p>That would be the whole relationship. There is a magic to what goes on between a mated couple ~ not just in the bedroom, but in their smallest, every day actions toward one another. Your son is trying to reach in and cheapen and change that.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 590276, member: 1721"] Your son is engaging in voyeurism. Shame on him. In being rude enough to bring it up to you (after he was rude enough to listen, in the first place) your own son is trying to denigrate the sacredness of your relationship with your S.O.! He is taking a cheap shot at you as a woman. (One of the cheapest shots there is.) He is playing that same old game men play with women to rationalize their actions and behaviors so they can get what they want and walk away smelling like a rose while the woman's reputation suffers. And why is he is layering this horror and shame onto you? So he can rationalize/justify how he is a man even though he is living with his mommy and not creating his own life. Looking at your private life the way he is choosing to (and we have to remember that HE IS MAKING A CHOICE, HERE) enables him to change the focus of attention from his failure to thrive as an adult male. I agree with the others on this one: absolutely none of his business. That is why our children are supposed to be moved out by the time they are of an age to know what sex is. Life is short. Celebrate living with and loving S.O. Enjoy everything you can, everything you have. Especially with children like ours, there is so much pain, there are so many disappointments. Joy is the one thing that keeps us sane, that helps us remember what life is supposed to feel like. Don't let him take this from you, too. Don't let him dirty or change it. At bottom, the relationship you have with S.O. is sacred. That would be the whole relationship. There is a magic to what goes on between a mated couple ~ not just in the bedroom, but in their smallest, every day actions toward one another. Your son is trying to reach in and cheapen and change that. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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