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Creating a life of my own while worrying...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 668015" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hon, I'm so sorry. We do devote our lives to our kids, but that's one thing that gives us no guarantees. We do it out of love. You did the right thing. He isn't, but you did.</p><p></p><p>I would (my personal opinion) stay out of the inheritance thing. It's his money and you can't make him hang onto it. I would not get involved with the uncle. Your son is an adult and I would stop making yourself stressed and sick by even trying to find out what he is doing online. Don't check his FB. Don't look at the courts. Don't look at his bank records. Just let it go and live your own life. It is easier said than done, but you only hurt yourself if you check up on your son and what he's doing. You ca'n't control him and it hurts you to know what he's doing. Knowing won't help him OR you. Be good to YOU. YOU earned it. Detach from his life. You never know if he will change, but it has to be his idea. Right now he isn't ready. It's sad he is blowing the money, but legally he can burn it and throw it to the wind if he likes. And you can't stop that either. If he is always high, it is probably best and safer that he not have a car anyway. A car won't give him a new life. His mindset and friends and priorities have to change and that CAN happen, but it will come in it's own time.</p><p></p><p>I really believed my daughter was going to end up in jail/prison or die. She was using meth. She quit twelve years now.</p><p></p><p>In her own time. Without even telling us. Until she was sure.</p><p></p><p>Keep The Faith and do try to enjoy yourself. Being miserable will not help your son at all. Baby steps.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your hurting heart.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 668015, member: 1550"] Hon, I'm so sorry. We do devote our lives to our kids, but that's one thing that gives us no guarantees. We do it out of love. You did the right thing. He isn't, but you did. I would (my personal opinion) stay out of the inheritance thing. It's his money and you can't make him hang onto it. I would not get involved with the uncle. Your son is an adult and I would stop making yourself stressed and sick by even trying to find out what he is doing online. Don't check his FB. Don't look at the courts. Don't look at his bank records. Just let it go and live your own life. It is easier said than done, but you only hurt yourself if you check up on your son and what he's doing. You ca'n't control him and it hurts you to know what he's doing. Knowing won't help him OR you. Be good to YOU. YOU earned it. Detach from his life. You never know if he will change, but it has to be his idea. Right now he isn't ready. It's sad he is blowing the money, but legally he can burn it and throw it to the wind if he likes. And you can't stop that either. If he is always high, it is probably best and safer that he not have a car anyway. A car won't give him a new life. His mindset and friends and priorities have to change and that CAN happen, but it will come in it's own time. I really believed my daughter was going to end up in jail/prison or die. She was using meth. She quit twelve years now. In her own time. Without even telling us. Until she was sure. Keep The Faith and do try to enjoy yourself. Being miserable will not help your son at all. Baby steps. Hugs for your hurting heart. [/QUOTE]
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