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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 741054" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I dont care if your mom manipulates or your daughter has no ulterior motives. Your daughter has no respect or class to talk to you, who put her through college, as if you are trash. None. Or to demean you. Sorry. I have one son who talks to me disrespectually and I recently set strict boundaries on how he can talk to me. Or not. Up to him. My other kids are actually very kind and respectful and would NEVER talk to me that way. And I consider her talk demeaning and uncalled for. </p><p></p><p>Your mother isnt making things any better.</p><p></p><p>I am one who is done done done with being talked to shabbily. If I were in your shoes, I would find other loved ones and friends to hang around with. I would seek minimal contact in that situation. Just necessary stuff and not much conversing. </p><p></p><p>I have, as I said, one child who is not nice and three who are great. My attitute is that I wont come back for more nastiness. Not to anyone. Nobody deserves that. Nobody. Not one of us. Not you. And, yes, your daughter is nasty to not keep you up on what is going on with your mother and talking to you like you are unimportant.</p><p></p><p>Yes, it was possibly nice your daughter took in your mother and if you say its not for the money, I believe you. But you couldnt take in your mother due to work circumstances and maybe also your health. You are not young. She has money, is fortunate not to have to work, and has a spouse supporting her. They are young and likely healthy. So she could do it and you could not. If you live alone you have to work. Period. It was not your choice. And nobody should say you had a choice. Its wrong.</p><p></p><p>I guess Ive had it up to my eyeballs with people who are supposed to love us but love to put us down more. I dont allow that anymore. From anyone. Your daughter is smart. Even she thinks so. She knows she is treating you as if you are not as good as her and she knows when she is being mean. Or condenscending. She KNOWS it. Many here are very sadly used to this from their kids, but Im not used to that from most of mine. I have one who is like that and three who are horrified by him and dont accept him as he is, so I know the difference between a grown kid being nice and respectful and one who isnt. Big difference . Easy to spot. Most adult kids appreciate their parents and do not talk down to them. Most worry about us as we age. Thats the truth.</p><p></p><p>It is up to you how much of that drama you want to put up with. Perhaps just bring or send your mother a birthday gift certificate rather than have to report your whereabouts to your daughter who doesnt believe you anyway. On God's green earth, what does she think you are REALLY going to do???? Rob a bank with your mother??? Ask yourself honestly if you want to deal with this treatment or not? The answer lies with you and only with you. But I dont think you are doing anything wrong at all or are being treated with respect and I will stand by that. I think your daughter is being nasty and I dont know how far gone your mother is....but she is unhelpful if she still knows her own mind. But I do think your mother forgets. </p><p></p><p>Love and light! Do not doubt yourself. Dont let anyone make you feel small. You are precious and special.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 741054, member: 1550"] I dont care if your mom manipulates or your daughter has no ulterior motives. Your daughter has no respect or class to talk to you, who put her through college, as if you are trash. None. Or to demean you. Sorry. I have one son who talks to me disrespectually and I recently set strict boundaries on how he can talk to me. Or not. Up to him. My other kids are actually very kind and respectful and would NEVER talk to me that way. And I consider her talk demeaning and uncalled for. Your mother isnt making things any better. I am one who is done done done with being talked to shabbily. If I were in your shoes, I would find other loved ones and friends to hang around with. I would seek minimal contact in that situation. Just necessary stuff and not much conversing. I have, as I said, one child who is not nice and three who are great. My attitute is that I wont come back for more nastiness. Not to anyone. Nobody deserves that. Nobody. Not one of us. Not you. And, yes, your daughter is nasty to not keep you up on what is going on with your mother and talking to you like you are unimportant. Yes, it was possibly nice your daughter took in your mother and if you say its not for the money, I believe you. But you couldnt take in your mother due to work circumstances and maybe also your health. You are not young. She has money, is fortunate not to have to work, and has a spouse supporting her. They are young and likely healthy. So she could do it and you could not. If you live alone you have to work. Period. It was not your choice. And nobody should say you had a choice. Its wrong. I guess Ive had it up to my eyeballs with people who are supposed to love us but love to put us down more. I dont allow that anymore. From anyone. Your daughter is smart. Even she thinks so. She knows she is treating you as if you are not as good as her and she knows when she is being mean. Or condenscending. She KNOWS it. Many here are very sadly used to this from their kids, but Im not used to that from most of mine. I have one who is like that and three who are horrified by him and dont accept him as he is, so I know the difference between a grown kid being nice and respectful and one who isnt. Big difference . Easy to spot. Most adult kids appreciate their parents and do not talk down to them. Most worry about us as we age. Thats the truth. It is up to you how much of that drama you want to put up with. Perhaps just bring or send your mother a birthday gift certificate rather than have to report your whereabouts to your daughter who doesnt believe you anyway. On God's green earth, what does she think you are REALLY going to do???? Rob a bank with your mother??? Ask yourself honestly if you want to deal with this treatment or not? The answer lies with you and only with you. But I dont think you are doing anything wrong at all or are being treated with respect and I will stand by that. I think your daughter is being nasty and I dont know how far gone your mother is....but she is unhelpful if she still knows her own mind. But I do think your mother forgets. Love and light! Do not doubt yourself. Dont let anyone make you feel small. You are precious and special. [/QUOTE]
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